{"id":255,"date":"2024-04-03T07:49:00","date_gmt":"2024-04-03T10:49:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/?p=255"},"modified":"2026-09-27T15:31:49","modified_gmt":"2026-09-27T18:31:49","slug":"minor-super-villain-487-the-eel","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/?p=255","title":{"rendered":"MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 487: THE EEL"},"content":{"rendered":"

(Big 3 006, 1941) <\/p>\n

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Our story opens with Samson investigating a series of mysterious deaths and ship disappearances in naval yards across the country. Cut to beloved Samson supporting character J. Rembrandt Speedball hilariously painting camouflage on a Navy cruiser. He is briefly distracted by horniness, and when he manages to get ahold of himself *pow*, the ship has vanished.<\/p>\n

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Speedball is arrested as a spy and spends the rest of the issue failing to commit suicide in his cell (a hilarious joke in the 40s, I guess), while Samson very convincingly disguises himself as a sailor. This smokes out the real criminal, the Eel, a saboteur of no stated or even implied affiliation who has been substituting the Navy’s ship paint with a variety that becomes acidic when opposed to an electric charge. It turns out that the Navy just wasn’t thinking to check if their ships had sunk! And also that J. Rembrandt Speedball was so<\/i> horny for that lady that he completely missed any sight or sound of an entire cruiser sinking about three feet away from him. That’s some paint!<\/p>\n

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Anyway, Samson goes ahead and drowns everyone at the end. Message to all aquatic-themed villains: be more amphibious.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(Big 3 006, 1941)  Our story opens with Samson investigating a series of mysterious deaths and ship disappearances in naval yards across the country. Cut to beloved Samson supporting character J. Rembrandt Speedball hilariously painting camouflage on a Navy cruiser. He is briefly distracted by horniness, and when he manages to get ahold of himself […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[14,376,44,377,3,36,23,345,106,7,21],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-255","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-14","category-david","category-dead","category-eel","category-fox-features","category-good-henchmen","category-minor-super-villain","category-saboteur","category-samson","category-the","category-undersea"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/255","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=255"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/255\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":256,"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/255\/revisions\/256"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=255"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=255"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theskeletoncurse.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=255"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}