The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: Blaze Barton

  • ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 056

    Aliens are just like us if you think about it, man.

    Atlanteans:

    First things first: these are not actually Atlanteans, at least not yet. As far as I can tell, the word “Atlantis” is not employed in any Namor appearance from 1939-1941, and his people are collectively referred to as “Sub-Mariners” just like their prince. We are left with one of our signature Vexing Conundrums: just when do the Sub-Mariners become Atlanteans? Will we find out before we learn the location of Camp Lehigh or before someone says “Keystone City” in print? Only time will tell. 

    Given that they are only later assigned the status of being descended from the humans of old Atlantis (and then unassigned from it if I understand correctly – my interest in Namor has never been great enough that I internalized a lot of his lore), it makes sense that they are much less humanoid than a lot of their peers. They range from being full-on fish-men like Emperor Thakorr to being essentially human-looking but for their huge eyes. And not just human looking, as Namor’s own parentage attests: they can also successfully interbreed with humanity! And it’s a close enough hybridization that he’s not completely infertile, though the fact that he has only one conventionally-conceived child is a bit telling.

    One of the hallmarks of Marvel’s Atlanteans going forward is of course the fact that they all have blue or green skin, which is fun because it appears to have originally been a stylistic choice on the part of Bill Everett to indicate that they were underwater. Frankly I think that it was a good development: I have no desire to see Emperor Thakoor rendered in shades of pale pink. (Marvel Comics 001 1939)

    Balticans:

    Represented here by the villainous Rathia, the Balticans are an Atlantean subgroup that live in the Baltic Sea (natch). They might be a different colour than regular Atlanteans, but given the quality of the available scan and the unreliable nature of modern recolouring it is very hard to say for sure. (Human Torch v1 005b, 1941)

    Cygnusians:

    The Cygnusians and their enemies the Draconians are initially set up to star in a little allegorical story about institutionalized racism and the arbitrary nature of warfare, but things get derailed pretty quickly due to the fact that both Queen Luxor of Cygnus and Queen Feros of Draco are women and cheap misogyny laffs are easy. Rock Braddon of the Space Legion ends the war by arranging a queen-on-queen catfight. (Crack Comics 011, 1941) 

    Martians:

    After dealing with all the crazy bullshit that lurks beneath the Earth’s surface in 50032 CE and doing a bit of civilization-rebuilding, Blaze Barton and his romantic/ adventure partner Teddy set out to establish relations with the people of Mars. As they arrive they (and possibly also the Martians) learn that there is a second, bearded population of Martians who live in vast caverns under the planet’s surface and eschew modern technology other than rocket planes and planet-wide smoke screens. These Dark Martians capture Blaze and Teddy in order to hold them for a ransom of lamp oil from an Earth that is probably not equipped to deliver it, given the recent global disasters it has suffered, not to mention the 47 thousand-odd years since the collapse of the whaling industry.

    The main problem with being a low-tech antagonist in a science fiction world is that you are only effective as long as you can keep your opponent off-balance, as the Lord of Martianland learns when he gives Blaze a moment to breathe and finds his men completely outclassed by Blaze’s ray gun and working knowledge of electricity. The king himself is finished off with a low-tech right hook, and his people opt to learn about new and exciting sources of light. (Hit Comics 005, 1940)

  • ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 056

    ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 056

    Aliens are just like us if you think about it, man.

    Atlanteans:

    First things first: these are not actually Atlanteans, at least not yet. As far as I can tell, the word “Atlantis” is not employed in any Namor appearance from 1939-1941, and his people are collectively referred to as “Sub-Mariners” just like their prince. We are left with one of our signature Vexing Conundrums: just when do the Sub-Mariners become Atlanteans? Will we find out before we learn the location of Camp Lehigh or before someone says “Keystone City” in print? Only time will tell. 

    Given that they are only later assigned the status of being descended from the humans of old Atlantis (and then unassigned from it if I understand correctly – my interest in Namor has never been great enough that I internalized a lot of his lore), it makes sense that they are much less humanoid than a lot of their peers. They range from being full-on fish-men like Emperor Thakorr to being essentially human-looking but for their huge eyes. And not just human looking, as Namor’s own parentage attests: they can also successfully interbreed with humanity! And it’s a close enough hybridization that he’s not completely infertile, though the fact that he has only one conventionally-conceived child is a bit telling.

    One of the hallmarks of Marvel’s Atlanteans going forward is of course the fact that they all have blue or green skin, which is fun because it appears to have originally been a stylistic choice on the part of Bill Everett to indicate that they were underwater. Frankly I think that it was a good development: I have no desire to see Emperor Thakoor rendered in shades of pale pink. (Marvel Comics 001 1939)

    Balticans:

    Represented here by the villainous Rathia, the Balticans are an Atlantean subgroup that live in the Baltic Sea (natch). They might be a different colour than regular Atlanteans, but given the quality of the available scan and the unreliable nature of modern recolouring it is very hard to say for sure. (Human Torch v1 005b, 1941)

    Cygnusians:

    The Cygnusians and their enemies the Draconians are initially set up to star in a little allegorical story about institutionalized racism and the arbitrary nature of warfare, but things get derailed pretty quickly due to the fact that both Queen Luxor of Cygnus and Queen Feros of Draco are women and cheap misogyny laffs are easy. Rock Braddon of the Space Legion ends the war by arranging a queen-on-queen catfight. (Crack Comics 011, 1941) 

    Martians:

    After dealing with all the crazy bullshit that lurks beneath the Earth’s surface in 50032 CE and doing a bit of civilization-rebuilding, Blaze Barton and his romantic/ adventure partner Teddy set out to establish relations with the people of Mars. As they arrive they (and possibly also the Martians) learn that there is a second, bearded population of Martians who live in vast caverns under the planet’s surface and eschew modern technology other than rocket planes and planet-wide smoke screens. These Dark Martians capture Blaze and Teddy in order to hold them for a ransom of lamp oil from an Earth that is probably not equipped to deliver it, given the recent global disasters it has suffered, not to mention the 47 thousand-odd years since the collapse of the whaling industry.

    The main problem with being a low-tech antagonist in a science fiction world is that you are only effective as long as you can keep your opponent off-balance, as the Lord of Martianland learns when he gives Blaze a moment to breathe and finds his men completely outclassed by Blaze’s ray gun and working knowledge of electricity. The king himself is finished off with a low-tech right hook, and his people opt to learn about new and exciting sources of light. (Hit Comics 005, 1940)

  • ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 032

    Aliens (and So Forth) abound!

    Birdmen:

    The Birdmen inhabit Sunev, which is either a planet that orbits perilously close to Earth or a second moon of Earth, and which was supposedly formed out of a piece of our planet which broke away in the distant past. Sunev has never been discovered because of some pseudoscientific gibberish about light rays, but space explorer Zephyr Jones and his assistant Corky Grogan make landfall there while testing out Jones’ experimental rocket ship.

    The Birdmen of Sunev have one of those advanced and peaceful societies that function with the rigidity and ruthlessness of a military dictatorship populated by political naifs. As such, the ambitious Birdman Roudo is able to frame Zephyr and Corky and have them sentenced to death for supposedly collaborating with…

    Parrotmen:

    The Parrotmen! These ancestral enemies of the Birdmen are just kind of caveman versions of them – they don’t even have colourful plumage to justify the name (I know that these images are from a recoloured version but I checked and the original is like this too). Despite the fact that the Birdmen have a roughly Medieval level of technology (castles, steel, swords) they have not yet been able to come up with a way to contend with a bunch of big guys with clubs, and it’s up to Zephyr and Corky to blow them away with the tommy gun that they very sensibly thought to bring along on their space adventure. (Daring Mystery Comics 002, 1940)

    Center People:

    The Center People are one of the many intelligent species that populate the far-off Asteroid Djung. Their king, Goro, has allied with the Djunga King Leon against space heroes Captain Venture and the Planet Princess Zyra. Despite being depicted as spear-wielding ape-men who perform human sacrifice to a pool of lava, they are also armed with a selection of high-tech devices such as Goro’s Mind-Ray Projector, which he uses to briefly compel Captain Venture into his service. This dichotomy is not explored before the Center Person society is devastated by a volcanic eruption. (Master Comics 019, 1941)

    Core Creatures:

    The adventures of sci-fi hero Blaze Barton take place on an Earth ravaged by a freak orbital shift that brought it too close to the Sun in the year 50029 CE (or sometimes 3000 CE or 5029 CE). Blaze and a small human population survived this event by sheltering in a specially-built heat-proof city, and now must rebuild civilization on a radically altered world. 

    One of the first and greatest challenges faced by Blaze et al is the emergence of the underground-dwelling Core Creatures from the great cracks that have developed in the planet thanks to the rapid changes in temperature it has experienced. 

    The Core Creatures, and their king in particular, have an implacable hostility toward the human population, but also indulge in that hoary old trope of being super hot for human women. I do appreciate the fact that they appear to choose their king based on who has the most creepy skull face. (Hit Comics 001, 1940)

    I try and I try to keep these entries at a reasonable four species length, but I am vexed at every turn. Two issues after the Core Creatures breach the surface, Blaze & Co turn the tables and explore the subterranean world, where they encounter:

    Mud Monsters and Rock Men:

    While the Rock Men act as supplementary antagonists to the Core Creatures over the next couple of issues, the Mud Monsters only appear in this single panel. This is a shame, because they are by far the more visually interesting of the two groups. At least the fact that they live in such close proximity to the Rock Men allows us to speculate that they might be related species? That’s kind of fun. (Hit Comics 003, 1940)

    Like so many nonhuman societies, the Rock Men have a monarchy. There are better ways to live, guys!

    Pretty People of the Jewelled Caves: 

    The Pretty People are a bunch of foppish hotties who live in a state perpetual danger between the nations of the Core Creatures and Rock Men, and who survive by playing the two groups off of one another. They are also monarchists. As the most human-looking and least hostile group, these are the ones who the surface humans end up allying with.

    Speaking of alliances, the Core Creature and Rock Man Kings forge one in order to attack the Pretty People and are only driven off thanks to the intervention of the humans and their ray guns. Blaze Barton personally kills the Core Creature king here, ending the Core threat for good. (Hit Comics 003, 1940)

    Crustmen:

    In one final addendum, I reckon that these Crustmen, who attack the surface as part of a coordinated strike on humanity with a group of hostile Martians, are meant to be the Core Creatures. Given the differences in name and appearance I choose to believe that they are a related but distinct species of hostile sub-Earth humanoid.  (Hit Comics 007, 1941)

  • ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 032

    Aliens (and So Forth) abound!

    Birdmen:

    The Birdmen inhabit Sunev, which is either a planet that orbits perilously close to Earth or a second moon of Earth, and which was supposedly formed out of a piece of our planet which broke away in the distant past. Sunev has never been discovered because of some pseudoscientific gibberish about light rays, but space explorer Zephyr Jones and his assistant Corky Grogan make landfall there while testing out Jones’ experimental rocket ship.

    The Birdmen of Sunev have one of those advanced and peaceful societies that function with the rigidity and ruthlessness of a military dictatorship populated by political naifs. As such, the ambitious Birdman Roudo is able to frame Zephyr and Corky and have them sentenced to death for supposedly collaborating with…

    Parrotmen:

    The Parrotmen! These ancestral enemies of the Birdmen are just kind of caveman versions of them – they don’t even have colourful plumage to justify the name (I know that these images are from a recoloured version but I checked and the original is like this too). Despite the fact that the Birdmen have a roughly Medieval level of technology (castles, steel, swords) they have not yet been able to come up with a way to contend with a bunch of big guys with clubs, and it’s up to Zephyr and Corky to blow them away with the tommy gun that they very sensibly thought to bring along on their space adventure. (Daring Mystery Comics 002, 1940)

    Center People:

    The Center People are one of the many intelligent species that populate the far-off Asteroid Djung. Their king, Goro, has allied with the Djunga King Leon against space heroes Captain Venture and the Planet Princess Zyra. Despite being depicted as spear-wielding ape-men who perform human sacrifice to a pool of lava, they are also armed with a selection of high-tech devices such as Goro’s Mind-Ray Projector, which he uses to briefly compel Captain Venture into his service. This dichotomy is not explored before the Center Person society is devastated by a volcanic eruption. (Master Comics 019, 1941)

    Core Creatures:

    The adventures of sci-fi hero Blaze Barton take place on an Earth ravaged by a freak orbital shift that brought it too close to the Sun in the year 50029 CE (or sometimes 3000 CE or 5029 CE). Blaze and a small human population survived this event by sheltering in a specially-built heat-proof city, and now must rebuild civilization on a radically altered world. 

    One of the first and greatest challenges faced by Blaze et al is the emergence of the underground-dwelling Core Creatures from the great cracks that have developed in the planet thanks to the rapid changes in temperature it has experienced. 

    The Core Creatures, and their king in particular, have an implacable hostility toward the human population, but also indulge in that hoary old trope of being super hot for human women. I do appreciate the fact that they appear to choose their king based on who has the most creepy skull face. (Hit Comics 001, 1940)

    I try and I try to keep these entries at a reasonable four species length, but I am vexed at every turn. Two issues after the Core Creatures breach the surface, Blaze & Co turn the tables and explore the subterranean world, where they encounter:

    Mud Monsters and Rock Men:

    While the Rock Men act as supplementary antagonists to the Core Creatures over the next couple of issues, the Mud Monsters only appear in this single panel. This is a shame, because they are by far the more visually interesting of the two groups. At least the fact that they live in such close proximity to the Rock Men allows us to speculate that they might be related species? That’s kind of fun. (Hit Comics 003, 1940)

    Like so many nonhuman societies, the Rock Men have a monarchy. There are better ways to live, guys!

    Pretty People of the Jewelled Caves: 

    The Pretty People are a bunch of foppish hotties who live in a state perpetual danger between the nations of the Core Creatures and Rock Men, and who survive by playing the two groups off of one another. They are also monarchists. As the most human-looking and least hostile group, these are the ones who the surface humans end up allying with.

    Speaking of alliances, the Core Creature and Rock Man Kings forge one in order to attack the Pretty People and are only driven off thanks to the intervention of the humans and their ray guns. Blaze Barton personally kills the Core Creature king here, ending the Core threat for good. (Hit Comics 003, 1940)

    Crustmen:

    In one final addendum, I reckon that these Crustmen, who attack the surface as part of a coordinated strike on humanity with a group of hostile Martians, are meant to be the Core Creatures. Given the differences in name and appearance I choose to believe that they are a related but distinct species of hostile sub-Earth humanoid.  (Hit Comics 007, 1941)

  • DIVINE ROUND-UP 017

    You’ll never believe it: more gods. 

    the Serpent Gods: 

    While pursuing crook Rango in the African jungle, Yarko the Great comes across a couple being sacrificed to the Serpent Gods by being flung into a pit of sacred serpents. But are the serpents the Serpent Gods themselves? There is no further context given, so we must assume that they are.

    God style: Animist (Wonderworld Comics 015, 1940) 

    Gorm: 

    Gorm is the god of the villainous Hatchet Cult, a gang that the Flash encounters early in his career, but since the Hatchet Cult is made up of white gangsters surgically made to look Chinese in order to throw the authorities off of their trail, one must assume that Gorm is just another part of the ruse (though for who’s benefit these guys are praying is a mystery to me).

    God Style: Idol (Flash Comics v1 022, 1941) 

    the Great God Orrab: 

    The Great God Orrab is yet another idol to which Our Heroes are almost sacrificed, ho hum. The interesting thing about this particular god, however, is that the hero in question is Blaze Barton, which placed Orrab in the year 50033 CE or thereabouts, and makes it very possible that his worshippers are in fact post-apocalyptic remnants worshipping the equivalent of a McDonaldland statue.

    God Style: Idol (Hit Comics 009, 1941)

    Hu, the Horse God: 

    Adventurer Lance Larkin and a lady named Marsha are looking for the “Land of the Flying Dragons” in Siberia, and wouldn’t you know it, they find it! And there are flying dragons (well, “pterodactyls”) there! There are also caveman-style Ape-Men riding the dragons, who swiftly capture Lance and Marsha and take them to be sacrificed at the altar of Hu, the Horse God. It is only the arrival of Lance’s loyal steed Satan, taken to be an earthly avatar of Hu, that saves the two.

    So just why do a bunch of cavemen who ride flying reptiles and have never seen a horse in their lives have a horse as their god? Because hundreds of thousands of years ago when they came to this prehistoric enclave they had horses and those horses saved them from disaster somehow. This inspired the reverence, but didn’t stop the horses from eventually dying out, which then inspired the taming of the “pterodactyls”.

    God-Style: Idol (More Fun Comics 067, 1941) 

  • DIVINE ROUND-UP 017

    DIVINE ROUND-UP 017

    You’ll never believe it: more gods. 

    the Serpent Gods: 

    While pursuing crook Rango in the African jungle, Yarko the Great comes across a couple being sacrificed to the Serpent Gods by being flung into a pit of sacred serpents. But are the serpents the Serpent Gods themselves? There is no further context given, so we must assume that they are.

    God style: Animist (Wonderworld Comics 015, 1940) 

    Gorm: 

    Gorm is the god of the villainous Hatchet Cult, a gang that the Flash encounters early in his career, but since the Hatchet Cult is made up of white gangsters surgically made to look Chinese in order to throw the authorities off of their trail, one must assume that Gorm is just another part of the ruse (though for who’s benefit these guys are praying is a mystery to me).

    God Style: Idol (Flash Comics v1 022, 1941) 

    the Great God Orrab: 

    The Great God Orrab is yet another idol to which Our Heroes are almost sacrificed, ho hum. The interesting thing about this particular god, however, is that the hero in question is Blaze Barton, which placed Orrab in the year 50033 CE or thereabouts, and makes it very possible that his worshippers are in fact post-apocalyptic remnants worshipping the equivalent of a McDonaldland statue.

    God Style: Idol (Hit Comics 009, 1941)

    Hu, the Horse God: 

    Adventurer Lance Larkin and a lady named Marsha are looking for the “Land of the Flying Dragons” in Siberia, and wouldn’t you know it, they find it! And there are flying dragons (well, “pterodactyls”) there! There are also caveman-style Ape-Men riding the dragons, who swiftly capture Lance and Marsha and take them to be sacrificed at the altar of Hu, the Horse God. It is only the arrival of Lance’s loyal steed Satan, taken to be an earthly avatar of Hu, that saves the two.

    So just why do a bunch of cavemen who ride flying reptiles and have never seen a horse in their lives have a horse as their god? Because hundreds of thousands of years ago when they came to this prehistoric enclave they had horses and those horses saved them from disaster somehow. This inspired the reverence, but didn’t stop the horses from eventually dying out, which then inspired the taming of the “pterodactyls”.

    God-Style: Idol (More Fun Comics 067, 1941) 

  • ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 021

    A motley crew of mostly cavemen await ye. 

    Pleistocene Men: 

    When rich jerk Rodney Stark wants to take over the world, he know just where to go: the Arctic, where he can use his heat ray to thaw out a frozen tribe of prehistoric men to act as his personal army. Did he already know that they were there or was he just assuming that he could dig up a few guys just by sinking a hole any old place? Unclear.

    In what must have been an unexpected boon for Stark, the Pleistocene Men turn out to have been altered both physically and mentally by their long stay in the ice. Not only are they now super strong and invulnerable to harm, but they are also super smart for some reason? Stark just handwaves it by saying that the cold sharpened their intelligence, but in practical terms it means that they learn to speak English and fly planes super fast.

    Captain Marvel ends up dropping Stark and his entire caveman air force back down the hole he originally dug them out of, where presumably they froze solid again. Who knows how powerful they will become before next they are thawed? (Whiz Comics 007, 1940)

    Ape-Men:

    A simpler type of prehistoric remnant, these Ape-Men are encountered by boxer/adventurer Socko Strong on an isolated Atlantic island full of dinosaurs before the entire place blows up courtesy of a local volcano. (Adventure Comics 042, 1939)

    Bat Men of Venus: 

    These Bat Men have come from Venus to Earth c.50 030 CE to engage in some friendly diplomatic relations. Unfortunately for them, this is not long after a global catastrophe has not only drastically reduced the human population but unleashed the hostile Crust Dwellers onto the surface of the planet, and they are almost fatally menaced before being rescued by heroic Earthling survivor Blaze Barton. 

    Really appreciate a) bat people designs that really commit to the weirdness of bat faces b) gliding bat people c) seeing some different Venusian designs before the Venus = aquatic paradigm really sets in in the 1950s. (Hit Comics 002, 1940)

    Beast Men of Boota: 

    The Beast Men of Boota are just what it says on the tin: beast men (or at least hairy guys) who are from Boota, which I assume is what this forest village is called. They live in one of the innumerable lands beneath the Antarctic that are traversed by Cotton Carver, and briefly worship him as the Tunder Man, thanks to his surface world guns. (Adventure Comics 054, 1940)