The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: Hand

  • FASCIST GOON CLEARING HOUSE 004

    More goon/ more fascist

    The Band AKA the Anti-American Band AKA the Un-American Band are yet another take on the German-American Bund distinguished by the fact that they were infiltrated by Bruce Blackburn – Counterspy so a) they were one of the few gangs of fascist goons to last more than one adventure and b) they were the villains that Blackburn created his shortlived alter-ego the Destroying Demon to fight (Feature Comics 038-041, 1940-1941)

    The Advance Front! Fascist agitators who seem to be actual Nazis, or at least be using actual swastikas. I hesitate to call this refreshing but it’s at least simpler to call someone a Nazi than a crypto-fascist Nazi-alike German analog. Beat to tar by USA, the Spirit of Old Glory (Feature Comics 046, 1941)

    Hold Tight America is our first example of the fascist group that is calling for peace in order to advance their plans for war before being foiled by Doll Man (Feature Comics 049, 1941)

    The Hand is just as halfassed and slapdash as these chumps usually are but I’ll say this for them: they capture and almost manage to assassinate not just the Black Condor but FDR too! (Crack Comics 019, 1941)

  • FASCIST GOON CLEARING HOUSE 004

    More goon/ more fascist

    The Band AKA the Anti-American Band AKA the Un-American Band are yet another take on the German-American Bund distinguished by the fact that they were infiltrated by Bruce Blackburn – Counterspy so a) they were one of the few gangs of fascist goons to last more than one adventure and b) they were the villains that Blackburn created his shortlived alter-ego the Destroying Demon to fight (Feature Comics 038-041, 1940-1941)

    The Advance Front! Fascist agitators who seem to be actual Nazis, or at least be using actual swastikas. I hesitate to call this refreshing but it’s at least simpler to call someone a Nazi than a crypto-fascist Nazi-alike German analog. Beat to tar by USA, the Spirit of Old Glory (Feature Comics 046, 1941)

    Hold Tight America is our first example of the fascist group that is calling for peace in order to advance their plans for war before being foiled by Doll Man (Feature Comics 049, 1941)

    The Hand is just as halfassed and slapdash as these chumps usually are but I’ll say this for them: they capture and almost manage to assassinate not just the Black Condor but FDR too! (Crack Comics 019, 1941)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 333: THE FIVE FINGERS OF THE HAND

    MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 333: THE FIVE FINGERS OF THE HAND

    (Leading Comics 001, 1941)

    As promised: the Five Fingers of the Hand! Though the Seven Soldiers would go on the fight more than a few teams of super-henchmen, the Fingers are distinguished by being (mostly) pre-established characters. Fun!

    Big Caesar:

    Big Caesar is whatever. A regular-style gang boss with a good name, elevated by being included in the gang. He appears just this once, in a scheme that involves cutting the power to Broadway and then doing a crimewave in the dark. The Crimson Avenger and Wing take him down without significant effort.

    The Dummy:

    Like Big Caesar, the Dummy appears for the first time in this issue. Unlike Big Caesar, the Dummy would go on to bigger things – so much so that I am declaring him a very marginal full super-villain, which makes this a cheeky Yearbook entry for his 1941. 

    When first seen, the Dummy has two points of interest: 1. he is an “infamous kidnapper” and 2. he may or may not be a real, inanimate ventriloquist’s dummy. Even his gang is convinced that he is a front for one of their number. 

    Per his talents, the Hand sets the Dummy up with a sweet kidnapping job: he grabs various Hollywood types and leaves behind a lifelike statue in their place. The ransom is thus to “return them to life”. Sadly, the sculptor that they must have had on retainer to produce the statues is not shown.

    The Dummy is eventually revealed to be alive, though whether he is a very short human with a penchant for sitting still or some sort of animate wooden doll is not explored. Also unexplored: why the Dummy’s back room is full of duplicates of the statues that he has already left in place of his victims, and why he has statues of the Vigilante and his second-best sidekick Billy Gunn – it’s tough to imagine a scenario in which they might be useful (other than as a heavy object under which to trap the Dummy, of course).

    Number of Episodes of the “Super-Villains of Hollywood” podcast: part of a compilation episode about villains who come to Hollywood to do crimes.

    Body Count: 0

    End-of-Year Status: Captured

    The Needle:

    The Needle is a recurring foe of the Star-Spangled Kid and Stripesy, a tall thin guy with a needle gun and a wild look in his eyes. Due to the fact that I only pay attention to the cover date on comics and that that never actually lines up with the release date, his first appearance in 1942 won’t hit this blog for some time – he’ll likely be Minor Super-Villain 555 or the like.

    Anyway, he steals a ray gun and tries to blow up the Panama Canal for some reason.

    Professor Merlin:

    As with the Needle, Professor Merlin’s first appearance doesn’t take place until 1942. This is especially embarrassing because he actually dies before his first appearance, like one of those RPGs where you can die during character creation.

    Merlin’s scheme involves scamming gold out of a rich old prospector by exploiting his well-known fear of freezing to death, then managing to collapse a mine on himself when he uses dynamite to blow open a lock that looks like you could pick it with a small enough finger. Nobody comes out on top here: Prof Merlin dies a dummy despite ostensibly being a Smart Crook and Green Arrow and Speedy don’t even play that much of a role in his downfall.

    Red Dragon:

    Our final Finger and the only one to have already shown up previously here, the Red Dragon is his usual terrible self: he takes advantage of an old myth in order to enslave a Native American tribe and force them to mine radium. Lucky for them that the Shining Knight turns up to actually fulfill the prophecy and  kick the Dragon’s rear. It’s a real evil comic book crime rendered a fair bit less enjoyable to read because of all the racism.

    So: the Five Fingers of the Hand. Top notch themed name for a henchman group hampered somewhat by the ease with which they were all taken out. Any time the Hand shows up he should have a different iteration of the Fingers with him, and that’s that. Bring ’em back, at least in name.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 333: THE FIVE FINGERS OF THE HAND

    MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 333: THE FIVE FINGERS OF THE HAND

    (Leading Comics 001, 1941)

    As promised: the Five Fingers of the Hand! Though the Seven Soldiers would go on the fight more than a few teams of super-henchmen, the Fingers are distinguished by being (mostly) pre-established characters. Fun!

    Big Caesar:

    Big Caesar is whatever. A regular-style gang boss with a good name, elevated by being included in the gang. He appears just this once, in a scheme that involves cutting the power to Broadway and then doing a crimewave in the dark. The Crimson Avenger and Wing take him down without significant effort.

    The Dummy:

    Like Big Caesar, the Dummy appears for the first time in this issue. Unlike Big Caesar, the Dummy would go on to bigger things – so much so that I am declaring him a very marginal full super-villain, which makes this a cheeky Yearbook entry for his 1941. 

    When first seen, the Dummy has two points of interest: 1. he is an “infamous kidnapper” and 2. he may or may not be a real, inanimate ventriloquist’s dummy. Even his gang is convinced that he is a front for one of their number. 

    Per his talents, the Hand sets the Dummy up with a sweet kidnapping job: he grabs various Hollywood types and leaves behind a lifelike statue in their place. The ransom is thus to “return them to life”. Sadly, the sculptor that they must have had on retainer to produce the statues is not shown.

    The Dummy is eventually revealed to be alive, though whether he is a very short human with a penchant for sitting still or some sort of animate wooden doll is not explored. Also unexplored: why the Dummy’s back room is full of duplicates of the statues that he has already left in place of his victims, and why he has statues of the Vigilante and his second-best sidekick Billy Gunn – it’s tough to imagine a scenario in which they might be useful (other than as a heavy object under which to trap the Dummy, of course).

    Number of Episodes of the “Super-Villains of Hollywood” podcast: part of a compilation episode about villains who come to Hollywood to do crimes.

    Body Count: 0

    End-of-Year Status: Captured

    The Needle:

    The Needle is a recurring foe of the Star-Spangled Kid and Stripesy, a tall thin guy with a needle gun and a wild look in his eyes. Due to the fact that I only pay attention to the cover date on comics and that that never actually lines up with the release date, his first appearance in 1942 won’t hit this blog for some time – he’ll likely be Minor Super-Villain 555 or the like.

    Anyway, he steals a ray gun and tries to blow up the Panama Canal for some reason.

    Professor Merlin:

    As with the Needle, Professor Merlin’s first appearance doesn’t take place until 1942. This is especially embarrassing because he actually dies before his first appearance, like one of those RPGs where you can die during character creation.

    Merlin’s scheme involves scamming gold out of a rich old prospector by exploiting his well-known fear of freezing to death, then managing to collapse a mine on himself when he uses dynamite to blow open a lock that looks like you could pick it with a small enough finger. Nobody comes out on top here: Prof Merlin dies a dummy despite ostensibly being a Smart Crook and Green Arrow and Speedy don’t even play that much of a role in his downfall.

    Red Dragon:

    Our final Finger and the only one to have already shown up previously here, the Red Dragon is his usual terrible self: he takes advantage of an old myth in order to enslave a Native American tribe and force them to mine radium. Lucky for them that the Shining Knight turns up to actually fulfill the prophecy and  kick the Dragon’s rear. It’s a real evil comic book crime rendered a fair bit less enjoyable to read because of all the racism.

    So: the Five Fingers of the Hand. Top notch themed name for a henchman group hampered somewhat by the ease with which they were all taken out. Any time the Hand shows up he should have a different iteration of the Fingers with him, and that’s that. Bring ’em back, at least in name.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 332: THE HAND

    (Leading Comics 001, 1941)

    The Hand holds the distinction of being both the first foe of the Seven Soldiers of Victory (all 9 or 10 of them) and the person who organized them as a team in the first place, and all as a way to get attention, essentially. As first presented, he is a master criminal so successful that he is unknown to the world at large who has just received word that he is dying with no hope of a reprieve.

    Somewhat understandably, the Hand decides to go out with a bang rather than a whimper, by recruiting five other super-villains to act as his “fingers” and carry out his most audacious crimes.

    We’ll get into the nitty gritty of the Five Fingers of the Hand in the next entry (because I have a system and I need to stick to it, okay?) but the long and the short of it is that the Hand gathers together pre-established supercrooks the Needle, Professor Merlin and the Red Dragon, never-before-seen supercrook the Dummy and lucky-to-be-considered schnook Big Caesar, outfits them with crime plans and sets them up in a classic Justice Society style “everyone split up and have a little adventure” adventure with what will become the Seven Soldiers of Victory.

    Though this might be the most reasonable reason for sending a taunting note to the forces of Law I have yet seen (after all, how greater the crime if it is actively opposed?), it remains a bad idea to do so, categorically, as evidenced by the fact that every one of the Five Fingers is summarily captured (or in the case of Professor Merlin, exploded) mid-caper, leading to the traditional final act of the JSA-style story wherein everyone comes together to beat up the mastermind.

    Who knows if the Hand could have handled them if he hadn’t been informed that his condition was, in fact, treatable just before the fight. Could he have taken on seven super-heroes if he still thought he was going to die? We will never know. Instead, he almost gets them with a lightning cannon but ends up being electrocuted by it, ironically dying just as he learned that he might have a chance to live.

    Or did he? No he didn’t, it turns out, because years later Len Wein wanted to bring back the Seven Soldiers of Victory and concocted a story wherein they were blasted through time, and who better to be responsible than their very first foe? And since that caper involved the Nebula Man, one of Grant Morrison’s favourite creeps, the Hand showed up in Seven Soldiers, too. He seems to have about a 30-year refractory period, so look for him on comic shelves sometime in 2036!

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 247: THE HAND

    (Flash Comics v1 015, 1941)

    It’s old hat by now: like former Hawkman foe Czar the Unkillable Man and his ilk, the Hand is a henchbeing who is far more interesting to read and talk about than their creator. This is the risk you run when you set out to create an autonomous crime-servant via… I’m guessing magical means? It’s unclear in the text but magic seems more likely than science.

    In this case, the creator is a guy named Edward Thayer, the black sheep of a wealthy family who has decided to turn his amazing talking and flying disembodied hand to the sordid task of killing off his brother Elwin and niece Teddy so that he can inherit enough money to convince some lady to sleep with him. Cue my usual complaints about crooks in super-hero universes not aiming high enough.

    Edward never gets to see his ill-gotten money, though, because Sandra (the lady in question) decides to bump him off for a quick buck. Which leads to the above panel: not only a rare hero/ villain teamup but an as-far-as-I-know unique hero/ disembodied hand teamup! Sadly, the revenge rampage ends with not only Sandra but the Hand itself seemingly plummeting to their deaths in a crashing car. Boo, says I! The Hand should be BRUNG BACK post-haste! Give it a bartending job somewhere.