The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: murderer

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 563: SCORPIO

    MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 563: SCORPIO

    (Wonderworld Comics 008, 1939) 

    We open on Dr Fung and his pal Dan making the acquaintance of write Corey Crews on a transcontinental flight. Crews claims that he is about to expose “the biggest phony cult in Frisco” and then is promptly murdered. The telegram that he received just before said murder reads: “you have failed Scorpio… fate is in your hands”.

    Whether there actually is a cult or not is never resolved but seems dubious, as Scorpio turns out to be operating a wholesale blackmail scheme under cover of some generic mysticism. When confronted with… not evidence but the mere hint that he might be under suspicion, Scorpio demonstrates his most prominent character trait, that he has absolutely no chill. He pulls a gun and takes off, not only dumping his costume on the ground and thus demonstrating that he was wearing a costume (versus just being a hollow-eyed seven-foot tall weirdo) but leaving all of his  blackmail material to be destroyed by Dr Fung.

    Dr Fung arranges a challenge of mysticism between Scorpio and sinister stage magician Arno (there’s a plot point involving Mira, a woman who has psychic abilities while under hypnosis but honestly this is an unnecessary level of investigative rigour given Scorpio’s aforementioned lack of chill), during which Scorpio is immediately murdered with a mysterious arrow and just as immediately revealed to in fact be Scorpio’s manservant. 

    So who killed Scorpio/ who is Scorpio? Dr Fung’s assistant Dan? Reporter Ted Collins? Stagehand and brother of former victim Crews? Sinister and satanic magician Arno?

    Of course it’s Arno. Who else could it be? And because Arno is Scorpio, Arno has no chill and tries to kill Dr Fung in front of an audience of hundreds rather than be exposed.

    Questions left unanswered: was there ever an actual cult or was it just a cover for blackmail? Why did Arno/ Scorpio think that killing his servant would solve anything? Where did Arno get that cool arrow-shooting wand?

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 560: VLADIM

    (Wonderworld Comics 005, 1939) 

    Our hero, Yarko the Great, is driving along a country lane outside London when his travels are interrupted by a bestial figure who runs out of a nearby castle and immediately drops dead. While Yarko is examining the body a monocled creep emerges from some nearby bushes Homer Simpson-style to introduce himself as “Vladim, a genius!” For me, this is exciting, because he shares his somewhat-unusual name with the seldom-mentioned, never-seen airplane designer of the Blackhawk Squadron and you better believe I think about that guy more than most people (just how these two characters created by Will Eisner came to share a name is a mystery for the ages).  

    As any self-proclaimed genius would, Vlamir brings Yarko to his underground sanctum to show off his magical experiments and I just want to emphasize something about his setup: beneath his castle is a series of bridges and staircases seemingly to the scale of Moradin in the first Lord of the Rings movie, yet his magical laboratory is housed in a room the size of a large bathroom and furnished with one (1) light, one (1) art and one (1) large skull-themed throne.

    Also please note that the initial view of the throne was out of proportion for dramatic effect and that the actual placement of the skull ensures that unless it is made of plush velvet, that sucker is going to be wildly uncomfortable to sit in for any length of time. This as much as the fact that Vladim has trapped a woman in a fire pit using a voodoo doll has me convinced that he’s just started out on the road of dark magic and is indulging his every whim – a more experienced villain would know the long-term importance of good lumbar support.

    Yarko of course has little trouble dealing with a dilettante like Vladim: in short order he frees the girl, turns a bestial henchman back on his creator and kind of kills Vladim. If hounding a man along a narrow bridge with an image of your own floating head until he slips on his own knife and falls into the murky depths of his basement can be counted as killing a guy. Which I suppose it can.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 559: THE COUNCIL OF VAMPIRES

    (Wonderworld Comics 004, 1939)

    Firstly: re the first panel, I really struggled with whether to call these guys the Deadly Council of Vampires or just the Council of Vampires. Still doubting myself.

    Secondly: I am going to lay out these guys’ whole deal up front in order to properly critique them in the manner I am compelled to: they are not, despite the name, vampires. Instead, they are what seems to be a cult devoted to a vampire named Anya and they are looking for an artifact called the Vampire Ruby that will allow her to live in “our world,” which contextually seems to mean that she will be able to remain awake and alive during the daytime.

    The Vampire Ruby turns out to be in the possession of an agent of the London Museum and here’s where my critique comes in: the Singapore branch of the Council captures that agent and tortures him to death in an unsuccessful attempt to get him to give up the Ruby’s location (he had it between his toes! Very sloppy searching on the Council’s part). BUT!

    THE CURATOR OF THE LONDON MUSEUM IS MARRIED TO ANYA! If they had just left the agent alone he would have taken it directly to their Queen! And then once protagonist Dr Fung and his pal Dan Barrister show up at the museum late on a Friday to say that they have Vampire Ruby, the curator invites them to his country estate for the weekend rather than (presumably) waiting until Monday office hours for them to come back with it!

    If the curator (Luigi Bishop, btw) was just able to be cool for two and a half days he would have had the thing! Instead, he brings a famous detective to his mirror-filled home to meet his vampire bride.

    But maybe I’m being unfair to the mortals in this story. After all, they’re all in thrall to a vampire who is dumb enough to tip off Fung and his pal Dan before doing a clumsy room invasion on them when, again, just waiting a couple of days would have delivered them the ruby on a silver platter. Presumably some of that dumb impulsiveness rubbed off on the ordinary cult members.

    It all ends in a huge fire, like maybe a third of all vampire stories. Anya and her husband perish and the Singapore branch of the cult has to find something else to do on weekends.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 557: DEATH

    (Wonderworld Comics 003, 1939)

    Like I said in the Devil’s entry yesterday: Death and the Devil have teamed up as a sort of Yarko the Great Revenge Squad because Yarko saves so many live and souls, respectively. I also mentioned that Death did all of the legwork toward getting Yarko just where they wanted him, and here that is: Death kills a seemingly random London man then delivers him to the police, leaving only a calling card behind.

    The discovery that the calling card’s address was that of a cemetery is enough to convince Inspector Drake of Scotland Yard that this is a case for Yarko the Great, and… obviously Drake is right because even the most well-trained officer is going to have a hard time dealing with Death himself, but have some gumption, man. Try to track down where the card was printed or something before abdicating all responsibility.

    Yarko makes his way to Death and the Devil’s Limehouse lair, where he is promptly captured, put in a deathtrap, escapes and banishes the Devil back to the netherworld. Death takes more of a background role in this latter part of the adventure, but that’s okay because he looks great – mostly quite cool but a bit sleazy too, because this ain’t your regular Death, this is Bad Boy Death.

    In the end, the Devil having been vanquished, Death just leaves. Yarko can’t actually affect him, and there’s even some hinting that the man in the car was not killed so much as dies naturally and was just used as bait, which implies that Death has no way of affecting someone who isn’t about to die anyway. He does kill a reluctant henchman who refuses to go up against Yarko, but maybe he was about to die too – working for the Devil has to be a dangerous profession, right?

    Death returns in Wonderworld Comics 008 after a Madame Punjai finds the creatively-named Golden Amulet, which compels his service. Punjai is obsessed with her lost youth and beauty and because of this commands Death to kill the young and beautiful Carla Dennis, a former passing acquaintance. This is done seemingly on a whim? There’s no real exploration of Madame Punjai’s plans, whether toward regaining her lost youth or revenging herself on the beautiful women of the world.

    Yarko the Great of course becomes involved in these shenanigans and the more-hapless-than-evil Madame Punjai is tricked into trading her life for that of Carla’s. Death is again cheesed off about this. BUT WHY IS HE? He’s going to get basically everyone eventually, even in a comic book world with immortals and so forth. Why care? Is this a Discworld style Death who gets into human roles like hobbies? Maybe.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 557: DEATH

    (Wonderworld Comics 003, 1939)

    Like I said in the Devil’s entry yesterday: Death and the Devil have teamed up as a sort of Yarko the Great Revenge Squad because Yarko saves so many live and souls, respectively. I also mentioned that Death did all of the legwork toward getting Yarko just where they wanted him, and here that is: Death kills a seemingly random London man then delivers him to the police, leaving only a calling card behind.

    The discovery that the calling card’s address was that of a cemetery is enough to convince Inspector Drake of Scotland Yard that this is a case for Yarko the Great, and… obviously Drake is right because even the most well-trained officer is going to have a hard time dealing with Death himself, but have some gumption, man. Try to track down where the card was printed or something before abdicating all responsibility.

    Yarko makes his way to Death and the Devil’s Limehouse lair, where he is promptly captured, put in a deathtrap, escapes and banishes the Devil back to the netherworld. Death takes more of a background role in this latter part of the adventure, but that’s okay because he looks great – mostly quite cool but a bit sleazy too, because this ain’t your regular Death, this is Bad Boy Death.

    In the end, the Devil having been vanquished, Death just leaves. Yarko can’t actually affect him, and there’s even some hinting that the man in the car was not killed so much as dies naturally and was just used as bait, which implies that Death has no way of affecting someone who isn’t about to die anyway. He does kill a reluctant henchman who refuses to go up against Yarko, but maybe he was about to die too – working for the Devil has to be a dangerous profession, right?

    Death returns in Wonderworld Comics 008 after a Madame Punjai finds the creatively-named Golden Amulet, which compels his service. Punjai is obsessed with her lost youth and beauty and because of this commands Death to kill the young and beautiful Carla Dennis, a former passing acquaintance. This is done seemingly on a whim? There’s no real exploration of Madame Punjai’s plans, whether toward regaining her lost youth or revenging herself on the beautiful women of the world.

    Yarko the Great of course becomes involved in these shenanigans and the more-hapless-than-evil Madame Punjai is tricked into trading her life for that of Carla’s. Death is again cheesed off about this. BUT WHY IS HE? He’s going to get basically everyone eventually, even in a comic book world with immortals and so forth. Why care? Is this a Discworld style Death who gets into human roles like hobbies? Maybe.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 555: SHADDIBA

    (Wonder Comics 002, 1939)

    Shaddiba appears in the first adventure of magic hero Yarko the Great as an old enemy of Yarko who has come to the town of Hexville in the Allegheny Mountains of Pennsylvania. His exact reasons for doing so are unstated, so I reckon that it’s equally likely that Hexville is an especially ripe spot for crime as that he was attracted by the old haunted mansion on the hill that he moves into. Comic book expectations aside I reckon that sourcing those has to be a real estate nightmare – I’ve certainly never had the opportunity to rent one.

    Shaddiba’s dumb name also introduces the possibility that perhaps Yarko is not alone, that all magic users in this continuity have made-up nonsense monikers. It’s the only rational explanation!

    Shaddiba does a lot of mouthing off to Yarko about what a great magician he is and how much Yarko sucks and to be fair Yarko is unable to break the mental hold that Shaddiba has on several locals in order to compel them to rob and murder (as well as on a local woman because he is a creep), but this is definitely classified as hubris.

    The fact that Shaddiba lambastes Yarko for intruding on the “sacred arts” of the “magic of the East” and then immediately invokes Lucifer as the source of his power is weird.

    The disagreement between the two magicians comes to a head in an all-out astral smackdown. A lot of the astral battling that we’ve seen so far (e.g., the one in this Mr Justice episode) has been quite quick-and-dirty decisive, so it’s neat to see these fellows really get into it.

    Shaddiba surrenders rather than be flung into the Chasm of Oblivion but if there’s one trait almost universally shared by super-villains it’s being a sore loser and so he blows himself to smithereens rather than live with the consequences of his actions.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 554: THE MASK

    (Wonder Comics 001, 1939)

    A gun runner doing business with rebel forces in the probably-South American country of Mauchako, the Mask doesn’t bring a lot to the table beyond a fairly snazzy take on the low-effort costume. He’s also the first foe faced by super-spy K-51 (is his original callsign of K-5, as you may have noticed). He’s also a US Senator, which is a heckuva job to split your attention from – also, weirdly he’s not our first one. He ends up employing K-51’s childhood pal and then murdering said pal so it’s not too surprising that he himself does not survive the adventure.

    In conclusion, the Mask isn’t terribly exciting. He does have a good look, so that’s something.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 554: THE MASK

    (Wonder Comics 001, 1939)

    A gun runner doing business with rebel forces in the probably-South American country of Mauchako, the Mask doesn’t bring a lot to the table beyond a fairly snazzy take on the low-effort costume. He’s also the first foe faced by super-spy K-51 (is his original callsign of K-5, as you may have noticed). He’s also a US Senator, which is a heckuva job to split your attention from – also, weirdly he’s not our first one. He ends up employing K-51’s childhood pal and then murdering said pal so it’s not too surprising that he himself does not survive the adventure.

    In conclusion, the Mask isn’t terribly exciting. He does have a good look, so that’s something.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 548: MADAME DOOM

    (Smash Comics 004, 1939)

    We will be seeing more of Madame Doom, as she is Black X’s only real recurring foe (I think), but as far as 1939 goes she made one appearance and this is it. 

    Madame Doom, a freelance spy, is working for “the dictators” in an attempt to steal US defense plans and prevent the signing of a pretty vague treaty that acts as a deus ex machina reason for war not to have broken out yet (war with the US, that is).

    In this first appearance Madam Doom is a very by-the-book Will Eisner femme fatale: a ruthless lady with the hots for the hero (reciprocated).

    Black X doesn’t quite let her go on purpose but he certainly doesn’t try very hard to catch her. This is a mistake! The bloom definitely wears off the rose in this relationship later on.

    UPDATE: Madame Doom 1940

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 541: THE HOODED FIGURE

    (Silver Streak Comics 001, 1939)

    Simply a man who reacts to losing his pilot’s license in a very rational way: he sabotages planes at the local airfield and also booby traps all the parachutes so that they will strangle anyone that uses them.

    Upon being hunted down by two-fisted detective the Duke, the Hooded Figure makes the common mistake of trying to get away in a plane that he himself had already sabotaged. Ah, irony.