The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: good henchmen

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 1001: BARON KRAWMAN

    (Lightning Comics v1 005, 1941)

    Whiz Wilson and his Futuroscope are once again engaging in the Doctor Who style of time travel, in which you just kind of pop into a random time and place and ask a bystander how things are going. In this case he has ended up in Florida in the year 3000, and the vest-wearing Florida Man he speaks to is pretty smug about how great things have been for the past thousand years. Perhaps he is rounding up or thinking extremely locally, because previous Whiz Wilson stories have established a general civilizational collapse in 2040 CE and a more localized one in South America around 2500 CE.

    More importantly, as if summoned by the words “these are wonderful times,” this is the moment that a squad of giant robots attack the city.

    Whiz Wilson is as ever a man of action and takes advantage of a poorly-secured access hatch on the back of one of the robots to get inside and beat up the pilot. This in turn causes the over-cautious leader of the robot pilots, now revealed to be a man named Baron Krawman, to recall his forces.

    Joining the queue of robots in his newly-commandeered ride, Whiz follows them to a domed underwater city “about ten miles” off the Florida coast.

    A quick and stealthy search of the city leads Wilson to an imprisoned woman who introduces herself as Betty Walters, Krawman’s former assistant. She tells him that a) the city is part of the lost continent of Atlantis that Krawman stumbled upon (though how it was missed during a thousand years-plus of intensely ocean-facing Florida life is beyond me) and b) that he is bent on destroying civilization because they laughed at him. Annoyingly, she does not explain why all of Krawman’s minions are nigh-identical bearded beefcakes, because that is all that I am asking about. Was he experimenting with cloning? Are these the descendants of lost Atlantis? Does he just have a type? 

    Whiz and Betty return to the commandeered robot and engage Krawman in thrilling robot-hand-to-robot-hand combat for the future of Florida, a combat that ends with Krawman dead and his city flooded. Once again Whiz Wilson has saved the people of a time period so far in his own future that his bones are naught but dust. Hooray!

    Categorized in: Accessories (Giant Robots), Origins (Villains of the Future), Royalty (Barons)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 1001: BARON KRAWMAN

    (Lightning Comics v1 005, 1941)

    Whiz Wilson and his Futuroscope are once again engaging in the Doctor Who style of time travel, in which you just kind of pop into a random time and place and ask a bystander how things are going. In this case he has ended up in Florida in the year 3000, and the vest-wearing Florida Man he speaks to is pretty smug about how great things have been for the past thousand years. Perhaps he is rounding up or thinking extremely locally, because previous Whiz Wilson stories have established a general civilizational collapse in 2040 CE and a more localized one in South America around 2500 CE.

    More importantly, as if summoned by the words “these are wonderful times,” this is the moment that a squad of giant robots attack the city.

    Whiz Wilson is as ever a man of action and takes advantage of a poorly-secured access hatch on the back of one of the robots to get inside and beat up the pilot. This in turn causes the over-cautious leader of the robot pilots, now revealed to be a man named Baron Krawman, to recall his forces.

    Joining the queue of robots in his newly-commandeered ride, Whiz follows them to a domed underwater city “about ten miles” off the Florida coast.

    A quick and stealthy search of the city leads Wilson to an imprisoned woman who introduces herself as Betty Walters, Krawman’s former assistant. She tells him that a) the city is part of the lost continent of Atlantis that Krawman stumbled upon (though how it was missed during a thousand years-plus of intensely ocean-facing Florida life is beyond me) and b) that he is bent on destroying civilization because they laughed at him. Annoyingly, she does not explain why all of Krawman’s minions are nigh-identical bearded beefcakes, because that is all that I am asking about. Was he experimenting with cloning? Are these the descendants of lost Atlantis? Does he just have a type? 

    Whiz and Betty return to the commandeered robot and engage Krawman in thrilling robot-hand-to-robot-hand combat for the future of Florida, a combat that ends with Krawman dead and his city flooded. Once again Whiz Wilson has saved the people of a time period so far in his own future that his bones are naught but dust. Hooray!

    Categorized in: Accessories (Giant Robots), Origins (Villains of the Future), Royalty (Barons)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 991: ZIRA

    (Jungle Comics 013, 1941)

    While searching for her champion Sir Champion (annoying thing to have to write and the main reason I’m happy that he eventually fades into obscurity), who has failed to return from a hunt, Camilla, Queen of the Lost Empire is confronted by the ghostly vision of a blonde lady who rules an ancient lost castle. This is just a kind of person you get in the undefined part of Africa that houses the Lost Empire.

    The lady’s name, by the way, is Zira, Princess of the Palace of the Black Heart. She also refers to herself as a “wizardess,” and while I am generally of the opinion that gendered job titles like that are retrograde and unhelpful I must admit to being charmed. Wizardess!

    This vision leads Camilla back to the aforementioned Palace of the Black Heart, where her mortal form is revealed to be a middle-aged lady, or “old hag” as our hero so tactfully puts it. Zira states that Sir Champion is locked up in her dungeon and she will return him in exchange for all of Camilla’s magic powers. The sum total of these powers, from my notes, being the ability to talk to gorillas and the power to call upon Thor and Baal to freeze someone. Frankly not a bad trade for someone’s life. Do we include her eternal life? She got that from a potion, after all.

    Camilla evidently wishes to continue to speak to apes and so she and her men battle with Zira’s forces until they are ironically defeated by some apes.

    It then turns out that Camilla has more tricks up her sleeve than I had in my notes. She offers to brew up a potion to make Zira good looking in exchange for freedom for her and her men, and since this is the same comic that made a point of calling Zira a wizardess, she is of course very vain by default and takes the deal immediately.

    The thing about taking advantage of a woman’s default vanity in such a comic is of course the fact that the vain woman will also be extremely fickle, as seen when the newly-hot Zira reneges on her deal in favour of keeping Sir Champion for her own horny purposes. Things quickly turn violent and Sir Champion is forced to slay Zira to save Camilla’s life. All in all it’s a real eleventh-hour fumble on Zira’s part.

    Categorized in: Accessories (Castles), Genrica (Ends in -a), Powers (Various Magics)

  • MAD AND CRIMINAL SCIENTIST ROUND-UP 027

    A series of cautionary tales for budding young scientists.

    Orid Dass:

    Orid Dass is your standard jungle scientist: he’s out there making apes into men and men into apes, all for the love of the ape-man game. He also has the distinction of being the only foe faced by Fantomah the one post-Fletcher Hanks adventure in which she is still kind of a jungle demigod rather than a jungle hero who knows some magic.

    In that capacity, Fantomah does a little man/ape transformation of her own, turning both Dass and his ape-men into little green monkeys until he reverts his latest victim (a white guy) to human form, though why she couldn’t just do it herself is not explored.

    Dass briefly gets one over on Fantomah by dropping her into a pit lined with radioactive ore, as this is also the one issue in which her powers are neutralized in the presence of radiation, but is subsequently crushed when his entire base collapses on top of him – the downside to the convenience of building your science compound on top of a huge radioactive cavern system, I guess. (Jungle Comics 016, 1941)

    Doktor Teufel:

    Doktor Teufel lives on the aptly-named Death Mountain and spends his time enslaving passing US aviators and building advanced radio-powered technology, implicitly in service to some nefarious plot against the United States. He’s a prime example of the kind of villain who is perfectly positioned to achieve all of his goals but who has not planned for the fact that a radium-powered super-hero – specifically Radior, the X-Ray Powerman – is going to walk fly a convertible through his front door and dismantle his entire operation in twenty minutes. (Key Ring Comics, 1941)

    Dr Dietz:

    We meet Dr Dietz after he has successfully stolen a high-powered experimental aircraft, and he spends so much time bragging about this and about how great a weapon it will make once he has mounted his disintegrator ray cannon (or “death-beam”) on it to Federal Agent Steve Crawford* that he never actually gets around to mentioning whether he intends to use it for espionage or for personal gain. He himself is disintegrated before he gets a chance to clarify. (Liberty Scouts Comics 002, 1941)

    *Referred to as “Steve Crawford, Undercover Man” despite the fact that in this, his only recorded adventure he is operating under his own name and openly as a lawman.

    the Mad Scientist:

    The aptly-named Mad Scientist has been setting forest fires as a way of capturing strapping young firefighters from the nearby CCC* base as fodder for his experiments. He is aided in this by his mind-controlled niece Nancy and a huge goon named Gaston (who wears a very cool-looking protective suit while traipsing through the burning forests).

    And just what is the radical theory that has driven the Mad Scientist to both the fringes of society and the outskirts of scientific ethics? Why, he believes that if he electronically incinerates a human body just right then it will become “solid gas.” Exactly what does this mean? I cannot really say, but going by the available evidence from his eventual successful creation the result is a living, tangible human with a massively decreased density and a radically different metabolism. 

    *the Civilian Conservation Corps, a New Deal work program.

    As I said, the process is eventually successful, turning a CCC firefighter named Jim into the mighty Fire-Man, but while the Mad Scientist was able to conceptualize and bring into existence an entirely new form of life he was not as visionary about the benefits of proper lab safety and both he and Gaston were fatally exploded in Fire-Man’s subsequent attempt to escape his captor. (Liberty Scouts Comics 002, 1941)

  • MAD AND CRIMINAL SCIENTIST ROUND-UP 027

    A series of cautionary tales for budding young scientists.

    Orid Dass:

    Orid Dass is your standard jungle scientist: he’s out there making apes into men and men into apes, all for the love of the ape-man game. He also has the distinction of being the only foe faced by Fantomah the one post-Fletcher Hanks adventure in which she is still kind of a jungle demigod rather than a jungle hero who knows some magic.

    In that capacity, Fantomah does a little man/ape transformation of her own, turning both Dass and his ape-men into little green monkeys until he reverts his latest victim (a white guy) to human form, though why she couldn’t just do it herself is not explored.

    Dass briefly gets one over on Fantomah by dropping her into a pit lined with radioactive ore, as this is also the one issue in which her powers are neutralized in the presence of radiation, but is subsequently crushed when his entire base collapses on top of him – the downside to the convenience of building your science compound on top of a huge radioactive cavern system, I guess. (Jungle Comics 016, 1941)

    Doktor Teufel:

    Doktor Teufel lives on the aptly-named Death Mountain and spends his time enslaving passing US aviators and building advanced radio-powered technology, implicitly in service to some nefarious plot against the United States. He’s a prime example of the kind of villain who is perfectly positioned to achieve all of his goals but who has not planned for the fact that a radium-powered super-hero – specifically Radior, the X-Ray Powerman – is going to walk fly a convertible through his front door and dismantle his entire operation in twenty minutes. (Key Ring Comics, 1941)

    Dr Dietz:

    We meet Dr Dietz after he has successfully stolen a high-powered experimental aircraft, and he spends so much time bragging about this and about how great a weapon it will make once he has mounted his disintegrator ray cannon (or “death-beam”) on it to Federal Agent Steve Crawford* that he never actually gets around to mentioning whether he intends to use it for espionage or for personal gain. He himself is disintegrated before he gets a chance to clarify. (Liberty Scouts Comics 002, 1941)

    *Referred to as “Steve Crawford, Undercover Man” despite the fact that in this, his only recorded adventure he is operating under his own name and openly as a lawman.

    the Mad Scientist:

    The aptly-named Mad Scientist has been setting forest fires as a way of capturing strapping young firefighters from the nearby CCC* base as fodder for his experiments. He is aided in this by his mind-controlled niece Nancy and a huge goon named Gaston (who wears a very cool-looking protective suit while traipsing through the burning forests).

    And just what is the radical theory that has driven the Mad Scientist to both the fringes of society and the outskirts of scientific ethics? Why, he believes that if he electronically incinerates a human body just right then it will become “solid gas.” Exactly what does this mean? I cannot really say, but going by the available evidence from his eventual successful creation the result is a living, tangible human with a massively decreased density and a radically different metabolism. 

    *the Civilian Conservation Corps, a New Deal work program.

    As I said, the process is eventually successful, turning a CCC firefighter named Jim into the mighty Fire-Man, but while the Mad Scientist was able to conceptualize and bring into existence an entirely new form of life he was not as visionary about the benefits of proper lab safety and both he and Gaston were fatally exploded in Fire-Man’s subsequent attempt to escape his captor. (Liberty Scouts Comics 002, 1941)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 987: WILLIAM SCOTT

    (Jackpot Comics 002, 1941)

    William Scott is your textbook mad scientist delving into the mysteries of life and death that man was not meant to comprehend, and in fact is so clearly going to be a problem that Mr Justice shows up to tell him off in advance, just based on a feeling. Despite this, Scott signs up condemned gangster “Rod” Dugan (and whether the Rod part is short for Rodney or the now-somewhat obscure slang for a gun is impossible to know. Probably the gun, though) as a candidate for post-execution reanimation. Prison officials! You have to stop releasing bodies to men with crazed looks in their eyes who stink of ozone!

    Scott’s plan is successful, and he soon has his very own science revenant that he sends out to loot and plunder for him. Please not the multiple dentition-based signifiers in the above: while Dugan’s tusk-like canines are one of the signifiers of the monstrous in Mr Justice comics, Scott’s missing teeth are a mark of his derangement, like his long messy hair and the deep circles around his eyes.

    Mr Justice has no trouble tracking down Scott as the source of the trouble, having already pegged him as a troublemaker. He proves to be more than a match for the the resurrected Dugan, but is unable to fully defeat him fully. The reason for this is simple: though Scott brought Dugan’s body back to life, his soul is condemned to wander in torment until it is laid to rest. This is all set-up for a Mortal Shell vs. Immortal Soul fight to the death, and the Immortal Soul is not playing around.

    Meanwhile, Scott takes the classic mad scientist’s way out and blows himself, along with his lab, to high heaven. Hopefully he gets to reconnect with his old friend Rod Dugan when he gets there.

    Categorized in: Supercrime (Monster Making)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 987: WILLIAM SCOTT

    (Jackpot Comics 002, 1941)

    William Scott is your textbook mad scientist delving into the mysteries of life and death that man was not meant to comprehend, and in fact is so clearly going to be a problem that Mr Justice shows up to tell him off in advance, just based on a feeling. Despite this, Scott signs up condemned gangster “Rod” Dugan (and whether the Rod part is short for Rodney or the now-somewhat obscure slang for a gun is impossible to know. Probably the gun, though) as a candidate for post-execution reanimation. Prison officials! You have to stop releasing bodies to men with crazed looks in their eyes who stink of ozone!

    Scott’s plan is successful, and he soon has his very own science revenant that he sends out to loot and plunder for him. Please not the multiple dentition-based signifiers in the above: while Dugan’s tusk-like canines are one of the signifiers of the monstrous in Mr Justice comics, Scott’s missing teeth are a mark of his derangement, like his long messy hair and the deep circles around his eyes.

    Mr Justice has no trouble tracking down Scott as the source of the trouble, having already pegged him as a troublemaker. He proves to be more than a match for the the resurrected Dugan, but is unable to fully defeat him fully. The reason for this is simple: though Scott brought Dugan’s body back to life, his soul is condemned to wander in torment until it is laid to rest. This is all set-up for a Mortal Shell vs. Immortal Soul fight to the death, and the Immortal Soul is not playing around.

    Meanwhile, Scott takes the classic mad scientist’s way out and blows himself, along with his lab, to high heaven. Hopefully he gets to reconnect with his old friend Rod Dugan when he gets there.

    Categorized in: Supercrime (Monster Making)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 966: ARPOR, HIGH PRIEST OF EVIL

    (Fantastic Comics 015, 1941)

    I’ve mentioned this in the past but it bears repeating: some Golden Age comics read like a fever dream, in which barely connected events just kind of float by as you read. This story is one of those, but also has a sort of exquisite corpse quality in that the connections between events almost make sense but when you step back and look at the whole it is astonishing. To whit:

    – Samson and David are just hanging around in whatever US city they call home when they notice a weird truck in the street outside. When they go out to investigate the truck it turns out to be full of poison gas.

    – After disposing of the truck (the purpose of which is never revealed), the duo follow some nearby thugs to a warehouse full of counterfeiting equipment. Samson tosses the whole building into the river and then fishes out the one surviving thug.

    – The thug reforms out of gratitude and tells Samson that the mastermind behind the warehouse is Arpor, High Priest of Evil.

    – Samson and David make their way to Arpor’s stronghold in the nearby mountains, dodging various traps and ambushes along the way. Eventually, Samson pretends to be knocked out by a fall so that he can be captured. He is taken back to Arpor’s temple lair to be sacrificed to a moderately off-model Kali. As an aside, Arpor’s cultist minions appear to be called Fiends, which is fun.

    – Not even a whole cult is enough to take on Samson and Arpor is eventually rounded up (after a few more hijinks) and taken away to jail.

    So what is Arpor up to here? Is the counterfeiting setup funding the cult or meant to destabilize society in some way that ties in with the usual comic book shorthand of Kali = Thuggees = wanton murder? Is this where the poison gas comes in? We will never know!

    Shout out to this sweet cone-shaped lightning rifle that Arpor uses to blast Samson into submission. Love an energy weapon that dares to not just look like a fancy tommy gun.

    Categorized in: Abstract Concepts (Evil), Misc (Cult Leaders), Profession (Priests)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 966: ARPOR, HIGH PRIEST OF EVIL

    (Fantastic Comics 015, 1941)

    I’ve mentioned this in the past but it bears repeating: some Golden Age comics read like a fever dream, in which barely connected events just kind of float by as you read. This story is one of those, but also has a sort of exquisite corpse quality in that the connections between events almost make sense but when you step back and look at the whole it is astonishing. To whit:

    – Samson and David are just hanging around in whatever US city they call home when they notice a weird truck in the street outside. When they go out to investigate the truck it turns out to be full of poison gas.

    – After disposing of the truck (the purpose of which is never revealed), the duo follow some nearby thugs to a warehouse full of counterfeiting equipment. Samson tosses the whole building into the river and then fishes out the one surviving thug.

    – The thug reforms out of gratitude and tells Samson that the mastermind behind the warehouse is Arpor, High Priest of Evil.

    – Samson and David make their way to Arpor’s stronghold in the nearby mountains, dodging various traps and ambushes along the way. Eventually, Samson pretends to be knocked out by a fall so that he can be captured. He is taken back to Arpor’s temple lair to be sacrificed to a moderately off-model Kali. As an aside, Arpor’s cultist minions appear to be called Fiends, which is fun.

    – Not even a whole cult is enough to take on Samson and Arpor is eventually rounded up (after a few more hijinks) and taken away to jail.

    So what is Arpor up to here? Is the counterfeiting setup funding the cult or meant to destabilize society in some way that ties in with the usual comic book shorthand of Kali = Thuggees = wanton murder? Is this where the poison gas comes in? We will never know!

    Shout out to this sweet cone-shaped lightning rifle that Arpor uses to blast Samson into submission. Love an energy weapon that dares to not just look like a fancy tommy gun.

    Categorized in: Abstract Concepts (Evil), Misc (Cult Leaders), Profession (Priests)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 961: DR ZINN

    MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 961: DR ZINN

    (Exciting Comics 009, 1941)

    Dr Zinn feels like a character who is somehow aware of my classification system and who is desperate not to be relegated to the ranks of the Generic Costumed Villain (yes, the “costumed” part has lost all meaning, I know) and so has shoehorned as many extra details into his appearance as possible to force me to give him Minor Super-Villain status. “what if I wasn’t just a super tall hypnotist, but also obsessed with snakes? And what if I ran a cult, the Cult of the Serpent, full of mind controlled thralls and they were also obsessed with snakes?” And I guess it worked.

    Dr Zinn’s main goal in his one appearance is to get ahold of the contents of a safe deposit box owned by a Mr Britt and his daughter, and while they never lay out what exactly is in there I certainly hope it’s securities or deeds to property or something, because if that little bundle of paper is meant to be cash then it’s like ten thousand dollars tops (I guess the Britts could have gotten their hands on some vanishingly-rare ten thousand dollar bills but we’re still not talking about multiple millions) and even in 1941 that’s not enough money to go to so much effort for.

    Zinn is captured after Edith Britt hires PI par excellence Dan Williams, who really undercuts the threat of hypnotic mind control by giving him a couple of eyes full of black pepper. 

    Addendum: I almost forgot to mention that Dr Zinn (whose first name is Mephiste, by the way) comes to the attention of the law when he orders some poisonous snakes through the mail and some get out and kill two postal workers, and he just grabs the rest and skedaddles out of there.