The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: patricide

  • SUPER-HERO FILE 005: THE HUMAN TORCH

    SUPER-HERO FILE 005: THE HUMAN TORCH

    (Marvel Comics 001, 1939)

    The Human Torch! The first major (and first overall) Marvel super-hero, despite the fact that my disorganized ass is writing about him third!

    The Human Torch is a synthetic man, aka an android (aka a synthezoid, which as far as I can tell means “cooler android” and won’t come into use until the 60s anyway) and created by Professor “Not Yet Phineas” Horton. Later stories will add all kinds of influences on and collaborators with Horton (including our recent subject Doctor Nemesis), but in the beginning it was just him, toiling away over his blonde creation.

    The Human Torch’s origin is shaped by three major factors: first, that Horton’s process was flawed in some strange way and as a result his android bursts into flame when exposed to oxygen. Secondly, there is the fact that Horton, despite the obvious scientific acumen and indeed genius on display in his creation, is seemingly devoid of any scientific curiosity outside of this. When confronted with the problem of a flaming android, Horton just throws his hands in the air and gives up without making any kind of real effort to mitigate the problem.

    Finally, the Torch is hampered by the fact that humanity at large, including Horton, is motivated by fame and fortune. Everyone who meets him wants to exploit him in some way, unless they are afraid of him – this is presumably why Horton’s first act upon creating him is to call in reporters rather than work on getting him to stop exploding.

    Though Horton can’t bring himself to work on a solution for the Torch’s problem, he balks at destroying his creation and so opts to seal him inside of an airless steel cylinder and then bury that cylinder in cement.

    Somehow, however, and perhaps relating to the fact that it was dropped into semi-solid cement from a decent height rather than laid down carefully and then covered up, the cylinder develops a crack through which enough air seeps in to set the Torch alight and cause him to burst his prison asunder. Everyone’s worst fears seem to be confirmed, as the newly self-aware android charges through the city streets, setting men, hats and telephone poles alight. A curious thing happens, however, and perhaps this reflects yet another failing on the part of Horton: the Human Torch realizes that he is hurting people and doesn’t want to. You should have talked to your artificial son, Professor, and then you might not have felt it necessary to seal him in concrete.

    In attempting to control his own flame (see? once again the child outstrips the parent), the Torch dunks himself in a swimming pool that turns out to belong to a criminal named Sardo who immediately sees the profit potential in a flaming man. Side note: Sardo also has a swimming pool that doubles as a vacuum chamber. Is there any use for such a thing beyond “elaborate deathtrap?”

    Sardo’s reaction to the Torch falls under theme #3 of this origin: Human Greed. He uses his weird pool to transfer the android to a sealed container and then uses him to burn down a warehouse as part of a protection racket scheme. Just like Horton, however, Sardo fails to reckon with the fact that the Torch might have opinions of his own about such things, and meets his end in their subsequent confrontation. 

    The Human Torch eventually figures out how to control his own flame thanks to Sardo’s stockpile of liquid nitrogen tanks – the nitrogen snuff the flame only temporarily but having done so a couple of times the Torch gets the hang of how to do so at will. We almost get a heartwarming father/son reunion as Horton argues for the Torch to be released into his custody, but then he goes and ruins it all by immediately starting to scheme about how much money he is going to make off of his creation’s back. This is the final straw as far as the Human Torch is concerned and he leaves via the most direct route: straight up.

    (Per Marvel Mystery Comics v1 002 this sets Horton’s house on fire and leads to his death, and the Torch isn’t sad about it)

    UPDATES

    Update 1940

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 690: VULCAN

    (Pep Comics 006, 1940)

    A man working in a London steam plant dies by falling into an industrial furnace. A horrible thing to happen! Why am I showing you this horrible thing?

    I am showing it to you because it is not in fact a horrible accident but a horrible murder, and we know that because the murderer left a horrible little bit of doggerel in order to crow about what he did, and he signed it “Vulcan.”

    Our old pal Inspector Bentley of Scotland Yard is brought in on this case, and it’s a lucky day for him because there are only four possible suspects: the four men who were in the immediate area when John Baker was killed, including his father, his brothers Rex and Bob and his romantic rival Barney Reyman. Like I said: lucky for Inspector Bentley because I’m beginning to suspect that he isn’t a particularly astute detective when he doesn’t have a guy in a rubber mask to hit with his cane.

    Am I saying this because Bentley’s only idea is to have everyone go back to where they were when the murder took place with the foreman standing in for his son and Pa Baker is basically instantly murdered too? Kind of, but it’s more of an observation that his investigations are a bit brute force. For instance, once this second member of the Baker clan is bumped off, Bentley arranges for another one to stand in front of the open furnace.

    Did Bentley know what he was doing? Was he calling Bob Baker’s bluff in order to force him to confess by dodging the deathtrap he had set up for his family members (a button-activated swinging pipe, fyi)? It’s possible, but I personally think that the “Vulcan = hatred for father and brothers” clue is some bullshit. Does Vulcan have more than his share of family drama? Absolutely, but no more than any other Greco-Roman god and frankly I would peg a guy named Vulcan as a potential matricide, if anything.

    So was he right or just trying to winnow down the suspect list a bit? Inspector Bentley will never tell.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 223: THE VULTURE

    (Doll Man 001, 1941)

    The Vulture! Flying thief extraordinaire! Terror of NYC for about a week!

    In reality the Vulture if a very weird looking guy named Aylmer who is predictably upset at his treatment by an uncaring world but seemingly mostly about being short. Hey, if Quality Comics New York is an accepting enough place that that’s all this guy gets bullied about then I have to give it to them, honestly.

    The really interesting thing about Aylmer/ the Vulture is not his technology (impressive as a homemade flying suit is) but the fact that he gets away at the end of the story and never appears again. Now, Doll Man comics aren’t quite as obsessively catalogued online as, say, Batman comics but as far as I can tell, this dude never ends up paying for the theft of millions of dollar worth of jewelry, the kidnapping of Martha “will someday be Doll Girl” Roberts or the murder of his own father, and in the Golden Age of Comics, motto Crime Does Not Pay, that is a wild and wooly thing to happen.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 223: THE VULTURE

    (Doll Man 001, 1941)

    The Vulture! Flying thief extraordinaire! Terror of NYC for about a week!

    In reality the Vulture if a very weird looking guy named Aylmer who is predictably upset at his treatment by an uncaring world but seemingly mostly about being short. Hey, if Quality Comics New York is an accepting enough place that that’s all this guy gets bullied about then I have to give it to them, honestly.

    The really interesting thing about Aylmer/ the Vulture is not his technology (impressive as a homemade flying suit is) but the fact that he gets away at the end of the story and never appears again. Now, Doll Man comics aren’t quite as obsessively catalogued online as, say, Batman comics but as far as I can tell, this dude never ends up paying for the theft of millions of dollar worth of jewelry, the kidnapping of Martha “will someday be Doll Girl” Roberts or the murder of his own father, and in the Golden Age of Comics, motto Crime Does Not Pay, that is a wild and wooly thing to happen.

  • GENERIC COSTUMED VILLAIN ROUND-UP 001

    I feel a little bad about what I said in the Armo post. The generic masked guys are, after all, trying their best, even if they aren’t quite measuring up to my standards. So while I can’t quite bring myself to write an individual post about each one, there’s no harm in doing a roundup of them every now and again, starting with the guys that Blue Beetle fought in 1941:

    Ivor Nick: 

    This guy had a lieutenant named the Wart and a dirigible that he eventually fell off of! (Blue Beetle v1 006)

    Mason: 

    This guy sabotaged his own construction company for convoluted reasons! (Blue Beetle v1 007, 1941)

    Carveth Manners: 

    This guy killed his own father for not that much money, honestly! (Blue Beetle v1 007, 1941)

  • GENERIC COSTUMED VILLAIN ROUND-UP 001

    I feel a little bad about what I said in the Armo post. The generic masked guys are, after all, trying their best, even if they aren’t quite measuring up to my standards. So while I can’t quite bring myself to write an individual post about each one, there’s no harm in doing a roundup of them every now and again, starting with the guys that Blue Beetle fought in 1941:

    Ivor Nick: 

    This guy had a lieutenant named the Wart and a dirigible that he eventually fell off of! (Blue Beetle v1 006)

    Mason: 

    This guy sabotaged his own construction company for convoluted reasons! (Blue Beetle v1 007, 1941)

    Carveth Manners: 

    This guy killed his own father for not that much money, honestly! (Blue Beetle v1 007, 1941)