The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: alien

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 799: GLORK

    MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 799: GLORK

    (Target Comics v1 009, 1940) 

    Glork here is a candidate for election to the post of King of Mars who manages to lose despite massive political interference on his part. This is probably because he is a very unpleasant and transparently evil person.

    Despite some recent real-world examples, Glork might still reign supreme as the worst-ever loser of an election. He immediately settles upon a plan to pull the moon Phobos down to the surface to destroy the entire Martian civilization, while he flees the planet in his personal spaceship to seek glory in the wider Solar System. 

    It can’t be a surprise at this point: Spacehawk does not take this kind of thing lying down. He busts into Glork’s secret lair disguised as a Martian, reverses the polarity on the device so that Phobos returns to its normal orbit, and when Glork makes a run for it Spacehawk uses the attractor machine to crash his spaceship in his own pit full of man- Martian-eating beasts. 

    Special shout out to this guy, who I completely thought was being set up to murder Glork in a fit of pique later in the story but who I guess was just an object illustration of what a jerk Glork was.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 797: JARK AND ZORG

    (Target Comics v1 007, 1940)

    Jark and Zorg, an alien duo of unknown provenance, continue the trend of Spacehawk villains who could broadly be described as space pirates. They also a) have a very hard pair of names to remember without accidentally mixing up some of the letters and b) are possibly the most phallic-looking alien designs that weren’t just ambulatory ding-dongs that I have ever seen.

    Jark and Zorg’s plan is… not simple, per se, but it doesn’t have a lot of steps. It goes like this: 

    1) get a planetoid and fit it with propulsion devices 

    2) fly around until you are in the path of a space freighter 

    3) use a tractor (bumper) beam to ensure that the freighter only crashes a little, so that the precious cargo is okay

    4) unleash a bunch of creatures called Snurls to wipe out the passengers and crew

    5) loot and profit

    It’s a solid enough plan, albeit one which requires a lot of advance effort and advanced technology, and Zorg even adds a step 6) kidnap a lady off of the first ship they bring down and transform her into an attractive phallus-alien for a little non-Jark companionship. Unfortunately for him, this particular lady is the same one who Spacehawk rescued from Grovak the Martian not two issues prior, and he seems to have some sort of Superman/Lois Lane ability to sense when she is in mortal peril, as despite Zorg’s certainty that their planetoid will never be discovered by the hero he is in fact already in orbit.

    Jark makes a go at taking care of Spacehawk with his atom rifle but it’s simply not enough firepower and he ends up mashed to a pulp.

    Zorg, building on his deceased partner’s efforts, seems to succeed where Jark failed, and further managed to unmask the Spacehawk to reveal that he was a robot the whole time!

    OR WAS HE? No, he wasn’t. Instead, the Spacehawk turns out to be a man with a collection of robot doubles that can substitute for him or otherwise aid him in his crusade against evil. Zorg ends up joining his partner in whatever afterlife that ding-dong aliens get and Spacehawk gets a smooch.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 796: GREBO

    (Target Comics v1 006, 1940)

    Grebo is a simple guy, even if he is a Mercurian. He’s on Venus with his pal Gogg hunting a lost stash of Mercurian platinum that was spirited away by the losing side of a long ago war in which Rogg and Grebo’s ancestors were the victors. And heck, that’d be simple treasure hunting if the underwater city that the swag was in were uninhabited, right?

    Sadly, it turns out that the defeated Mercurians (or the Draxions, as they call themselves) are very much in residence, having adapted to a watery existence as a way to hide from their ancient enemies. And it seems that their caution was entirely justified, as Grebo’s first response to discovering that the platinum might in fact not be up for grabs is to shoot Draxion leader Tuok.

    This little demonstration ensures that Grebo and Rogg have little trouble with the remainder of the peaceful Draxions, and they make their way to the platinum vault with little trouble. At which point Grebo makes some trouble, by murdering Rogg rather than split the loot with him. Classic villain stuff!

    All good things must come to an end, however, and that includes reigns of terror: having been summoned by his friends the Draxions, Spacehawk soon arrives and sends Grebo rocketing into space to his doom. Would Grebo have survived the encounter if he had, say, a second person to back him up? Probably not, but it surely couldn’t have hurt his chances.

    I have to say that the real star of this story were the Draxions. The contrast between their goofy Wolverton faces and the deadly action is surprisingly evocative. Googly-eyed weirdos can have hopes and aspirations too, after all.

    Once the danger is over, Spacehawk helps the Draxions re-adapt to land dwelling forms and I can’t choose between the goofy pointy-headed aquatic Draxions and the more businesslike clearly-enjoying-all-the-air-breathing land Draxions. I love them both dearly.

    Shout out as well to Grebo’s ship full of different types of Mercurians (plus some Saturnian pilots), not only for being great little designs but for (intentionally or not) preemptively shutting down any nit-picking about alien designs not being consistent between Spacehawk adventures. It’s because there are all kinds of different phenotypes, losers!

    (the crew panics when Spacehawk shows up and ends up flying the ship into a mountain, if you were wondering where they were during that final confrontation)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 795: GROVAK

    (Target Comics v1 005, 1940) 

    We meet Grovak the Martian space pirate as he and his crew are about to sacrifice a beautiful human babe in order to capture a portion of the protoplasmic Neptunian Creeping Death. Not only does this highlight Grovak’s ruthlessness but it shows what a bad boss he is – bullying, abusive, refusing to own up to his mistakes – Martian space pirates take note and seek employment elsewhere.

    Luckily for that never-named young woman, Spacehawk chooses this moment to show up and make his presence known with a blast from his flame ray pistol. Both the Creeping Death and Grovak get spooked and flee the scene.

    But a little mortal fear isn’t going to be enough to dissuade Grovak, not by a long shot. He moves forward with his plan, having already collected a portion of the Creeping Death by means of a less fortunate captive, and is ready to unleash it on unsuspecting space freighter crews in order to take their lives, their ships and their cargo, in order.

    Once again Spacehawk is compelled to step in, and while Grovak’s crew sensibly flees into the Neptunian hills, the villain himself attempts to destroy Spacehawk using the Creeping Death, only to end up on the receiving end of a protoplasmic devouring himself. It’s just like the old adage: you live by the horrible alien blob; you die by the horrible alien blob.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 795: GROVAK

    (Target Comics v1 005, 1940) 

    We meet Grovak the Martian space pirate as he and his crew are about to sacrifice a beautiful human babe in order to capture a portion of the protoplasmic Neptunian Creeping Death. Not only does this highlight Grovak’s ruthlessness but it shows what a bad boss he is – bullying, abusive, refusing to own up to his mistakes – Martian space pirates take note and seek employment elsewhere.

    Luckily for that never-named young woman, Spacehawk chooses this moment to show up and make his presence known with a blast from his flame ray pistol. Both the Creeping Death and Grovak get spooked and flee the scene.

    But a little mortal fear isn’t going to be enough to dissuade Grovak, not by a long shot. He moves forward with his plan, having already collected a portion of the Creeping Death by means of a less fortunate captive, and is ready to unleash it on unsuspecting space freighter crews in order to take their lives, their ships and their cargo, in order.

    Once again Spacehawk is compelled to step in, and while Grovak’s crew sensibly flees into the Neptunian hills, the villain himself attempts to destroy Spacehawk using the Creeping Death, only to end up on the receiving end of a protoplasmic devouring himself. It’s just like the old adage: you live by the horrible alien blob; you die by the horrible alien blob.

  • MINOR SUPER-HERO ROUND-UP 049

    Pretty diverse bunch this time.

    the Lone Rider: 

    Another masked cowboy hero dispensing justice from the barrel of the gun in the Old Modern West to throw in the pile. The Lone Rider does have the distinction of having been created by Jack Kirby for a very short-lived comic strip and recycled by Eastern Color for comic book content. 

    Having read through a decent chunk of the Lone Rider’s appearances, I’m pretty sure that Texas never actually put in an appearance, and that Pepito had maybe one panel to shine in – those are the risks you run when you start off with a cast of characters entry, I suppose. (Famous Funnies 062, 1939)

    the White Streak: 

    Discovered by archaeologist Simms and his guide Ramon in a temple that is inside of a small mountain that has risen out of a dead volcano (which is in turn in the fictional country of Payan, in  actual South America), the White Streak is an android built by the ancient dead civilization of Utopia, which perished in war and gifted their creation to the future as a way to prevent war from destroying any more civilizations. And by “the White Streak” I mean “Manowar,” which was clearly intended to be his super-hero name but was changed  for some reason – he’s barely even referred to as the White Streak for the first issue. Whatever his name, he took his mission very seriously: if you were in the business of promoting or profiting from war you could expect a very violent visit from the White Streak.

    At first, Manowar’s powers were limited to his electric vision and a bit of enhanced agility, but over time they expanded to include super strength, an electrical force field that still sometimes unnervingly came out of his eyes, and electrical constructs (most frequently a ladder, for some reason). (Target Comics v1 001, 1940)

    UPDATES: 1940 

    Boystate: 

    Okay, so Boystate is an indeterminably large chunk of land somewhere in the US within a few hours drive from NYC, containing a city (Boyville, natch) and founded and run by a fellow known as the Skipper (the Confederate officer-looking fellow, above) and his aide the Captain (the other guy). Boystate is unsurprisingly populated by boys, and has as its charter a dedication to bringing those often troubled boys up to be fine upstanding men.

    Of course this is all taking place in a comic that is written and set in 1940, so the comic’s views on how boys might be guided into that upstanding manhood involve a lot of homemade militia activity and discipline through violence, as seen here as new recruit Speck is smacked down by Boystate Ranger V.Y.

    The other hallmarks of the Boystate comics are 1) a deep love of pointless callsigns – everyone is V.Y. or X-1 and travel from Point 6-A to Tower 2-R and on and on in a way that makes your eyes glaze over, and 2) an absurd variety of cosmic ray-powered sci-fi technology, courtesy of the Skipper’s genius.

    In addition to the identity-stripping numerical designations, Boystate is simply chockablock with pseudo-military ranks and divisions for the boys to aspire to join so that they can spend their time patrolling Boystate airspace and riding her borders and chasing down passing cars to check if they’re stolen… frankly, if they weren’t collectively the protagonists of a comic book series in which they are described a good and true and aspirational Americans I would be tempted to call Boystate a nightmarish authoritarian police state/cult. Did I mention that the Skipper not only has a machine that can take video of anywhere in Boystate but also one that can read minds? (Target Comics v1 001, 1940)

    Spacehawk:

    As a big fan of Basil Wolverton, I wish that he’d had more opportunities to create science fiction comics during the time that he was interested in doing so, but in the absence of that, Spacehawk is pretty great. A mind-reading physical titan of unknown origin who metes out justice to the scum of the Solar System, Spacehawk is much more of a space-based super-hero than his contemporaries, and his alien foes are appropriately Wolvertonian grotesques who reflect their evil nature in their outward appearances.

    Sadly, Novelty Press was The Company Where Whimsy Was Not Welcome, and in 1941 Spacehawk was relocated to Earth to battle the Axis instead of all of those unrealistic aliens. Don’t get me wrong: Basil Wolverton comics about Spacehawk beating up Nazis are still pretty great, just not as great as ones about him beating up aliens. The move to 1940s Earth does introduce the as-far-as-I-know never answered question of just where all of the humans in the earlier Spacehawk comics were from, which is a fun if brief diversion.

    Finally, there’s a very minor bit of suspense in the first few Spacehawk stories over just what he is under that mask of his – an alien? a robot? something weirder? – but it turns out that he’s a hunk. Spoilers, I guess. (Target Comics v1 005, 1940)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 770: GOLI

    (Startling Comics 004, 1940)

    We open on a world in turmoil! The tides are going crazy! New York City is trashed!

    The world’s leaders turn to the mysterious Dr X for help, and he immediately recognizes that the problem must be Moon-based, and further that the solution will require his niece’s fiance Bob to go beat someone up. This is the second and final Dr X story of the Golden Age, and I really wish that there were more. Wizened scientists sending burly aides to beat up crooks is entirely in my wheelhouse

    Bob and Cynthia are promptly teleported to the Moon in their finest protective beachwear, and Bob gets to fight an excellent moon-beast.

    Bob and Cynthia are captured by Moon-Man forces who do indeed turn out to be the ones messing up the tides. This Moon-aggression is technically happening under the command of the unnamed Moon King and his tall horny daughter, but it becomes clear that the real architect of the plot against Earth is the Head Scientist, Goli. Never one to waste a couple of good prisoners, Goli has plans to stick some Moon-Man brains in Bob and Cynthia’s bodies in order to use them as spies in the post-apocalyptic Moon-Man invasion of Earth.

    In a lucky turn for Bob, Cynthia and the Earth, the Moon Princess is so horny for Bob that she sets the prisoners free. Goli is killed by Bob in a move that also smashes the tide machine, and one short teleporter ride later everyone is safely back in Dr X’s secret laboratory in the Andes.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 765: KILLRAYE

    (Speed Comics 007, 1940)

    Killraye is the leader of the extremely wild and wonderful looking Jupiter Men (courtesy of writer/artist/wild alien designer Munson Paddock) of an unspecified future, and leads them in an attempt to hijack plans for an advanced ray gun design from inter-planetary mail courier Mars Mason.

    (whether the Jupiter Men have a caste-based physiology and Killraye represents their ruling form or he is of a different species entirely is unclear. He certainly looks a lot different that them but on the other hand he does have the same furry legs and weird little round feet as they do)

    Mars Mason does not allow this violation of the sanctity of the mail to go unavenged, and not only blows up a considerable portion of the Jupiter Men’s city but send Killraye himself spinning off into space via what must have been a superhumanly powerful kick. Surely this is the end of Killraye!

    OR IS IT? 

    In fact, no, that was not the end of Killraye. In Speed Comics 008 it is revealed that the dastardly Jovian had not in fact been consigned to eternal exile in space but had landed on a comet complete with a population of Needle Men (related to and indistinguishable from Jupiter Men and just as willing to follow a guy like Killraye) as well as a weird super-powered skeleton alien. Rather than enjoy his second chance at life in peace, Killraye immediately resumes his piratical ways and inevitably ends up clashing with Mars Mason again.

    It seems like Killraye is finally going to get the upper hand, when the community-minded Saturn Men get involved and wreck house so thoroughly that Killraye himself does not actually get a death scene. Good night, sweet alien bastard.

    ADDENDUM: Killraye was a fine villain, but the real star of his second appearance was this unnamed hench-creature, whose host of positive attributes include:

    – amazing skeleton body

    – rare 1940s anime hair

    – a catch phrase: “Bah!”

    – the power to send its skeletal hands and feet across interplanetary distances to snatch up people and loot

    – a boss ray gun

    Truly this is the villain I want to see in my space comics.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 765: KILLRAYE

    (Speed Comics 007, 1940)

    Killraye is the leader of the extremely wild and wonderful looking Jupiter Men (courtesy of writer/artist/wild alien designer Munson Paddock) of an unspecified future, and leads them in an attempt to hijack plans for an advanced ray gun design from inter-planetary mail courier Mars Mason.

    (whether the Jupiter Men have a caste-based physiology and Killraye represents their ruling form or he is of a different species entirely is unclear. He certainly looks a lot different that them but on the other hand he does have the same furry legs and weird little round feet as they do)

    Mars Mason does not allow this violation of the sanctity of the mail to go unavenged, and not only blows up a considerable portion of the Jupiter Men’s city but send Killraye himself spinning off into space via what must have been a superhumanly powerful kick. Surely this is the end of Killraye!

    OR IS IT? 

    In fact, no, that was not the end of Killraye. In Speed Comics 008 it is revealed that the dastardly Jovian had not in fact been consigned to eternal exile in space but had landed on a comet complete with a population of Needle Men (related to and indistinguishable from Jupiter Men and just as willing to follow a guy like Killraye) as well as a weird super-powered skeleton alien. Rather than enjoy his second chance at life in peace, Killraye immediately resumes his piratical ways and inevitably ends up clashing with Mars Mason again.

    It seems like Killraye is finally going to get the upper hand, when the community-minded Saturn Men get involved and wreck house so thoroughly that Killraye himself does not actually get a death scene. Good night, sweet alien bastard.

    ADDENDUM: Killraye was a fine villain, but the real star of his second appearance was this unnamed hench-creature, whose host of positive attributes include:

    – amazing skeleton body

    – rare 1940s anime hair

    – a catch phrase: “Bah!”

    – the power to send its skeletal hands and feet across interplanetary distances to snatch up people and loot

    – a boss ray gun

    Truly this is the villain I want to see in my space comics.

  • NOTES – APRIL 2025

    NOTES – APRIL 2025

    Aliens:

    The adventures of Mars Mason, interplanetary mailman, are rife with amazing alien designs thanks to creator Munson Paddock, but the Tough-Tails of Planet Greentrees and their allies the top-hatted Spear-Men are possibly my favourite aliens that I’ve seen in a couple of years. (Speed Comics 009, 1940) 

    The Speed Comics 010 Mars Mason adventure again features some more top-notch alien designs, including both the Mercurian leader with his enormous ears and his subjects with their amazing hats. The Uranian Monster-Men are okay, but the real star of that second set of panels is Mars Mason’s amazing radiator suit that seems to help him weather both the cold of Uranus and the heat of Mercury with equal aplomb.

    Drawn Without Reference:

    A nice fuzzy spider created to menace Shock Gibson. (Speed Comics 010, 1940) 

    Good Henchmen:

    It’s not really germane to the story, but I would like to highlight the emotional journey that this henchman goes through over the course of a scheme by upcoming Minor Super-Villain Comrade Ratski. midway through a scheme to release giant arthropods on an unsuspecting populace is a heckuva time to confront your dislike of bugs. (Speed Comics 010, 1940)

    Honours:

    Ted Parrish, aka the mystery man known as the Man With 1000 Faces, wins the Academy Award for his performance in a film called Thundering Hoofs. We must make some assumptions – that Thundering Hoofs was completed and released in 1940, for example – but I think that Parrish might just have gotten his Oscar at the expense of Jimmy Stewart’s win for The Philadelphia Story. (Speed Comics 010, 1940)

    Mars Mason, Interplanetary Mailman, has his likeness on the Mercury Mail five-something stamp. (Speed Comics 011, 1940)