The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: Sub Saunders

  • ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 057

    Can you tell that I’ve hit the “M” portion of my aliens spreadsheet

    Martians:

    These very humanoid Martians have a whole series of problems: 

    1. some heavenly object is due to smash into their planet 

    2. they are bad at science

    3. when they turned to Earth to look for help with their problem the only person they could get to help them was this jerk named Ritton, who intends to cash in his Mars favour for help in taking over Earth 

    4 Ritton doesn’t even have the Super TNT they need to save their civilization, he just knows where to steal it 

    5. the Human Torch is involved and not happy about the way that Ritton and the Martians are handling things

    All this adds up to a long series of misadventures in which the Martians kind of half-ass attempts to steal the Super TNT formula from its creator Carson and then (because they crashed a train on top of Carson and killed him, right out of the gate) his daughter Diane while the Human Torch flies around beating them up.

    The Torch eventually captures Ritton and the Martians offer a mid-level apology for the hundreds of deaths that they have caused while working for him – they had to because the Great One said so! This is good enough for the Torch and Diane and they hand over the Super TNT. Mars is saved! (Marvel Mystery Comics v1 003, 1940)

    Mercurians:

    Rex Dexter of Mars has to operate outside of his sphere of expertise here, because these vile slavers are from Mercury. What’s worse, they haven’t just been capturing regular people to slave for them (we never actually learn just what kind of slavery the Mercurians are into) but have somehow also got ahold of Dexter’s ladyfriend Cynde.

    Though the Mercurian-on-the-street looks like an axe-wielding pig-man, the Mercurian leader Lord Curo and his elite guards all dress like they are in an owl-themed 1960s super-spy organization, possibly called W.H.O. This is very handy for Rex Dexter, who sneaks in after stealing a guard’s outfit and then sneaks all of the slaves out in some more guard outfits acquired in a quick brawl. Once Curo has no more Earth hostages, his city is bombed to dust by the vengeful humans. (Mystery Men Comics 019, 1940)

    Mercurians:

    These Mercurians are very boring white guys, but even boring aliens get acknowledged here. They might just be Earth colonists, though, so view them with mild suspicion. (Planet Comics 007, 1940)

    Mermen:

    The Mermen are an undersea race who work for the non-Merman and big creep Poseida to strip the ruins of the underwater city of Coralla of its riches. It’s possible that they are descended from the people who lived in Coralla before it was ruined, in which case this situation seems pretty galling, but if it bothers the Mermen, they aren’t complaining. Like most nonhuman servant races in comics they seem to have a pretty bad union. 

    It’s possible that the Mermen are related to the Frogmen of Atlantis, a similarly under-unionized aquatic species. (Fantastic Comics 003, 1940)

  • GENERIC COSTUMED VILLAIN ROUND-UP 043

    You give a guy access to a mask and some super-science and how does he repay you? Crime!

    Karno:

    The dapper Karno has a cool flying submarine, a metal-melting weapon and a plan to combine the two and do some old-fashioned piracy with them. He thinks that this scheme will be enhanced by the expert submarine piloting skills of Sub Saunders, but quickly learns the same lesson that all villains do upon incorporating a hero into their plans: it’s more hassle than it’s worth. Karno gets a sock on the jaw and his own submarine melted around him for his efforts. (Fantastic Comics 017, 1941)

    Captain Nomo: 

    Speaking of ocean-based criminals from the future, Captain Nomo wants to run a successful smuggling operation in the year 10 000, despite being a member of the Coast Patrol, so he puts on a mask and sets out to eliminate the greatest threat to his grift: Sub Saunders. It goes poorly! (Fantastic Comics 019, 1941)

    Bim Bagley:

    “Big-shot criminal lawyer” Bagley is so into the idea of being a drug kingpin that he does at least a couple of dozen murders in an attempt to get ahold of a big dope stash, including shooting down a whole-ass airliner. It doesn’t work out thanks to the Black Fury. (Fantastic Comics 022, 1941)

    Whitey:

    If he had only appeared once I would have written Whitey here off as just another dime-a-dozen gang boss, but in fact he vexes the Black Fury and Chuck an impressive four times, including at least twice after seemingly meeting a grisly end in the previous installment, and such persistence merits acknowledgement (particularly as his appearances all happen as Fox Features are entering their Time of Troubles and jettisoning most of their characters. His final appearance is in fact in a Holyoke-published issue of Blue Beetle!). Also please note the weird shadow on his right cheek, which is a persistent detail in his appearance that I think is supposed to be a gnarly scar. (Fantastic Comics 023, 1941)

  • ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 048

    Gosh! How alien they are!

    Frog-Men:

    These two Frog-Men cause trouble for Sub Saunders when they steal his ship for a little joyriding/ piracy session. They are undone by the fact that neither of them know how to drive, and are ultimately head-konked into submission after crash landing. What this tells us about Frog-Man society is unclear – if this were a Star Wars then the Frog-Men would end up being a race of car thieves, of course, but most societies don’t work like that. (Fantastic Comics 021, 1941)

    Martians:

    Today’s selection of Martians is going to include some classic design elements! First we have this species represented by the very helpful Darek. Darek is based on the old Speculative Evolution version of a Martian, with spindly limbs due to the lower gravity and huge ears and lungs to aid in hearing and breathing in a thin atmosphere. As a bonus, he’s also from a Mars that is covered in some classic canals, and has a hint of an interesting culture and mythology thanks to some early Jack Kirby writing. And of course he is green. A true classic Martian in many ways. (Crash Comics Adventures 003, 1940)

    Martians:

    These Martians aren’t quite as cool as the previous ones, but the ruddy tint to their skin is a real classic design element for aliens from the Red Planet. I also appreciate that they look a bit like Space Elves wearing little green hats. If “Space Smith” was still being created by Fletcher Hanks when they appeared I might speculate that they were of the same species as the Brain, but I can’t in good conscience do so now. Besides, even Hanks’ version of Mars supports multiple humanoid species.

    As a bonus, these Martians help Space Smith and Dianna defeat an attempted invasion of the Solar System by an extrasolar group called the Generals of Capella. We never actually learn much about these guys due to the fact that they attack with the aid of remote controlled meteors called “sandblasts,” but when has that ever mattered: they’re going on the list. (Fantastic Comics 009, 1940) 

    Martians:

    For our final Classic Martian Design Element, we have these warlike Martians dressed in futuristic Roman gear! The connection between the planet Mars and the god Mars has dramatically extended the reach of the brush-topped helmet in fiction over the years, and given us countless Martian aggressors to boot.

    These particular Martians are hell-bent on claiming the interior of one of the Living Planet Monsters as their own, for some reason, and the fact that they attack the human colonists who are already there is especially egregious because they don’t actually want to be there, they just got eaten. This unreasonable aggression is enough to make Saber, the Spy Fighter (there to rescue the Earth colonists) use his mega-powers to grow enormous and turf the entire Mars contingent out into the void of space. (Fight Comics 010, 1940)

  • ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 046

    ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 046

    Good lord! Aliens!

    Mupha’s Species:

    Mupha, ruler of the undersea Land of Peril, is the kind of creep who sends his subjects to kidnap women to become his queen. This eventually brings him into conflict with underwater adventurer Sub Saunders -not because Sub is looking for kidnappees but because he happens to pass by the Land of Peril and makes Mupha nervous enough to open fire on his submarine.

    As Mupha appears to have only two subjects we must assume that either a) his species is nearly extinct (which explains his quest for a mate but does not excuse it) or b) the Land of Peril is a breakaway group from a larger population somewhere, political exiles, perhaps, because of their pro-kidnapping policies. In either case, the group does not survive its encounter with Sub Saunders. 

    Also please note their stylish hooves, a very unusual feature in an aquatic species. (Fantastic Comics 018, 1941)

    Martians:

    The only example of this particular Martian species who we meet is Kodi, partner to Nick Nelson in the Space Patrol. At least, I think so. See, much like the adventures of Spacehawk, “Space Patrol” is a Basil Wolverton comic, and one thing that Basil Wolverton liked was drawing all kinds of different weird-looking aliens. So while Kodi is the only big-headed orange Martian who we see in the course of the series, there are also a variety of other Martians in a range of colours and shapes and who’s to say whether they aren’t all the same species? (Amazing Mystery Funnies v2 012, 1939)

    Spider Men:

    While there are also a variety of different Venusians depicted in the pages of “Space Patrol,” I am pretty confident in my assessment that they are unrelated to the Venusian Spider Men. Encountered by Nick and Kodi as they pursue a fugitive into the deep jungles of Venus (Tropical Jungle Planet being one of the old sci-fi paradigms for the planet), the Spider Men are presented as relentless predators of intelligent humanoids. They also look great, even better than my beloved Martian Spider-Men. Imagine: a whole species of balding men with unkempt beards!

    The Spider Men manage to drag Nick Nelson back to their cave home (where we learn that they are tool users!) but are ultimately no match for the Space Patrol’s various beams and rays. (Amazing Mystery Funnies v2 012, 1939)

    Mercurians:

    While looking into the disappearance of a space freighter and its cargo of green diamonds, Nick and Kodi track its location to a volcanic crater on Mercury, where the ship’s pilot has murdered the rest of the crew, stolen the diamonds and dumped the ship itself into a lava pit, with the aid of a crew of Mercurian Mole-Men. As is so often the case in a sci-fi story, our impression of an entire species must be formed by the actions of one of its worst members, and we simply must assume that this kind of theft and murder is atypical, or however would our nameless villain have gotten his job in the first place?

    As for the Mole-Men, they don’t get a lot of characterization beyond the fact that they are “the savage inhabitants of the underground regions,” but as always I do enjoy Wolverton’s use of morphological similarities (specifically the ears, nose and especially feet and legs) to show that they and our Mercurian friend evolved from some common ancestor. Plus it’s hard not to love a cave-full of little glaring goblin-men. 

    The Mercurian gets a bit to smug about the fact that he has Nick and Kodi at his mercy and manages to nearly blow his own head off with a phenomenally bad shot. I do not like his knees, but I do like that horde of rampaging Mole-Men.

    Having made their way back to their ship, Nick and Kodi decide to just skip the tedious parts of the legal system (arrest, trial, state-mandated punishments, etc) and skip straight to the execution. A few well-placed atom bombs and the volcano takes care of both the Mercurian and the Mole-Men for them. (Amazing Mystery Funnies v3 003, 1940)

    (very similar Mercurians are featured in Amazing Mystery Funnies v3 006, 1940)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 636 UPDATE: THE SERPENT LADY

    MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 636 UPDATE: THE SERPENT LADY

    (Fantastic Comics 016, 1941)

    We all remember the Serpent Lady, who lived in an underwater city with a bunch of weird ghouls and used her pet sea serpent to kidnap people for her minions to eat. And we all remember how Sub Saunders showed up and killed her serpent but let her go free for some reason (the reason is because she is a sexy lady who walks around in a gold bikini top). Well, the Serpent Lady hasn’t just laid down and given up, no sir. She is back.

    So, just how does the Serpent Lady follow up her old operation that revolved around Mephisto the sea serpent, why with the hot new Diablo, a two-headed sea serpent. Surely the only problem with the old plan was that it involved an insufficient number of serpent heads!

    Unfortunately for the Serpent Lady, not only does Diablo prove even less effective against Sub Saunders than Mephisto was (Mephisto took a whole four panels to die while Diablo goes down after three), but following his death her lieutenant Luco turns on her and attempts to take over the whole undersea snake thing by killing both her and Saunders.

    Though Luca believes himself to be ready for the big leagues this is absolutely not the case, as Sub turns the tables on him and slays him with his own deathtrap with absurd ease. He then spurns the Serpent Lady’s overtures of love and toddles off for the surface. BUT he also refrains from blowing her up, so there’s still a chance for these crazy kids.

  • ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 042

    ALIENS AND SO FORTH ROUND-UP 042

    I hope you like aliens, because I just can’t stop finding new ones. 

    Kobolians:

    The Kobolians are from the underwater city of Kobol in the year 10 000 CE, and while we don’t learn too much about how their society functions we can intuit a certain amount of civic pride, given that their leader is named Lobok – did he rise to power on the strength of that name? Did he adopt it? Is the city named after him? Whichever it is, Lobok commands enough loyalty that the Kobolians go along with him when he decides to acquire a human wife via extortion. And not just any human either, but the daughter of Biran, leader of the Army of New America!

    Though the Kobolians live in an underwater city, it is not flooded, indicating that they are amphibious rather than fully water-breathing. They might even be that most rare of things: the underwater species that is fully air-breathing!

    Anyway, Sub Saunders blows the place up after rescuing Ms Nirab. (Fantastic Comics 014, 1941)

    Magyans:

    Space adventurer Iron Munro (born on Jupiter in the 22nd Century and thus very physically mighty. If his name seems familiar it’s because it was swiped by Roy Thomas and used as the name of the post-Crisis Superman replacement) and his companions, after being blasted into a “new universe” (contextually, a new solar system) by a rogue asteroid, find themselves in the middle of a conflict between two groups called the Magyans and the Tefflans. 

    As explained by the Magyan leader, the roots of this conflict stem from a war between their ancestors and the underground-dwelling Tefflans on another planet, tens of thousands of years earlier, a conflict that resulted in the destruction of their mutual home continent as the remnants of both populations fled into outer space. Iron Munro takes an immediate wild swing and identifies this continent as Mu (why no Atlantis? Is Iron Munro a hipster?). 

    If the Magyans are the lost inhabitants of Mu, then what does that make the Tefflans? Why, they are weird evil goat-men, and thus the basis for all of humanity’s legends about demons and devils!

    Munro and his pals side with the humans, of course, and over the next six issues there is an escalating back-and-forth war between the Magyans and the more technologically-advanced Tefflans that culminates in a devastating final attack in which the Magyans launch their twin moons Ma-Ran and Ma-Kanee at the Tefflan planet of Teff-El. It’s a horrifying way to end a war! (Shadow Comics v1 002, 1940)

    Man-Apes:

    These Man-Apes serve megacreep Dr Wratt as muscle. They hold the particular distinction of being the least apelike ape-men that I have ever seen. (Jungle Comics 002, 1940)

  • GENERIC COSTUMED VILLAIN ROUND-UP 042

    GENERIC COSTUMED VILLAIN ROUND-UP 042

    Celebrated by none… until now. And then only mildly.

    Slavin:

    This masked man is the leader of a gang who have been systematically robbing warehouses and then burning them down. The culprit turns out to be Slavin, the general manager of the warehousing company, and not the red herring suspect Slivers, owner of the company (who is ugly, and therefore more likely to be evil than the handsome Slavin). PI Dan Williams is too enlightened to judge others based on their appearances though, and busts the right man.  (Exciting Comics 014, 1941)

    the Black Baron:

    After wandering around Europe and North Africa and only really hitting up the Crusades long enough to kill Saladin, Sir Richard of Warwick, aka the Golden Knight, returns home to find that his younger brother Roland is missing and a very rude man called the Black Baron is squatting on his lands.

    The Black Baron seemed like he might get a numbered entry by name alone but alas, he’s a true scrub. The Golden Knight and his friends murder all of his men with what I would call embarrassing ease and the Baron passes up an opportunity to get away with his life for another shot at the gold he is convinced that Roland is hiding from him. The Golden Knight then enacts a little Crusader-style justice on him. To death. (Fantastic Comics 014, 1941)

    Unnamed Fascists:

    What do you do when you’re notorious comic book oddball Fletcher Hanks and you need to draw a selection of Axis leaders but the US comics industry isn’t yet 100% on board with just explicitly depicting Hitler as an evil villain and so you need to have a bit of plausible deniability? Masked Axis leaders, obviously! (Fantastic Comics 014, 1941)

    Kong:

    This fellow, name of Kong, has a super-sub and is looking to use it to extort some quick cash from the future state of New America. A classic plan!

    Kong’s cachet is spoiled somewhat by the fact that the heroic Sub Saunders just walks in through the front door of his underwater base and lays him out with a single punch. As a villain it is very hard to come back from something like this. (Fantastic Comics 015, 1941)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 641: ONE-EYE

    (Fantastic Comics 013, 1940) 

    One-Eye is a stylish fellow with a real bone to pick with humankind, who have apparently rejected him for the heinous sin of Having Only One Eye, I guess? Unless having a widow’s peak and a long waxed mustache are considered disfigurements? I suppose that cultural mores do change over time and it is 8000 years in the future… in any case, the point is that he’s upset at the world and has decided to kill humanity off.

    To that end, One-Eye has gathered together a collection of generic mutants, all of whom are more interesting looking than him (and one of whom appears to be wearing some shockingly high-cut booty shorts).

    Among these recruits is this “giant devil-octopus” which a) has six arms, b) appears to be made of human skin and c) is the most unsettling thing I’ve seen in a comic in a long time.

    By contrast Kuga the man-eating giant cat is a walk in the park, a beauty to behold! Plus it is stuck in a too-small room so that One-Eye can drop people down a trap door in his office and have them slide directly into its mouth. Barely threatening at all!

    Ultimately Sub Saunders beats up the mutants, blows up One-Eye’s undersea base and hands him over to the authorities.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 636: THE SERPENT LADY

    (Fantastic Comics 012, 1940)

    We open on Mephisto, the Dreaded Poison Serpent, attacking a small boat and making off with its inhabitants. For a split second I am excited – maybe this is our long-sought criminal animal! – but then I remember the lessons I learned from Cephalopoda the Octopus and rein myself in.

    And it’s a good thing I did, for Mephisto is a mere tool of the mysterious Serpent Lady, who lives in a golden city in an undersea cave and rules over a population of bald creeps who need blood to live. Maybe? It’s possible that they just like blood. Either way, this is why she has been using her cool snake to kidnap surface dwellers: their delicious blood.

    Sub Saunders will not stand for blood theft in his god-given ocean. He slays Mephisto and a fair few bald-headed creeps but leaves the Serpent Lady alive and at liberty. Will she be returning? I read ahead a bit and yes she will!

    UPDATE 1941

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 636: THE SERPENT LADY

    MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 636: THE SERPENT LADY

    (Fantastic Comics 012, 1940)

    We open on Mephisto, the Dreaded Poison Serpent, attacking a small boat and making off with its inhabitants. For a split second I am excited – maybe this is our long-sought criminal animal! – but then I remember the lessons I learned from Cephalopoda the Octopus and rein myself in.

    And it’s a good thing I did, for Mephisto is a mere tool of the mysterious Serpent Lady, who lives in a golden city in an undersea cave and rules over a population of bald creeps who need blood to live. Maybe? It’s possible that they just like blood. Either way, this is why she has been using her cool snake to kidnap surface dwellers: their delicious blood.

    Sub Saunders will not stand for blood theft in his god-given ocean. He slays Mephisto and a fair few bald-headed creeps but leaves the Serpent Lady alive and at liberty. Will she be returning? I read ahead a bit and yes she will!

    UPDATE 1941