The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: group

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 328: THE NAZOMBIES

    MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 328: THE NAZOMBIES

    (Human Torch v1 005a, 1941)

    This is kind of a weird one in a few ways, the first being that the foundation of the plot is that a) Namor the Sub-Mariner and the Angel both own Caribbean islands and b) that they are good enough friends for Namor to pay the Angel a visit. During this visit one of Namor’s servants bursts in and promptly drops dead in an effort to deliver a note cryptically warning of a zombie takeover.

    Namor takes off on his own and indeed! Zombies have taken over his island! Kind of!

    I mean, even by 1940s standards of zombie these are clearly either costumed goons or some sort of monstrous humanoid group. They’re not explicitly identified as fancy dress Nazis until the third-to-last panel, but come on. Buncha goose-steppers establishing military bases and concentration camps across the Caribbean? That’s Nazis.

    The Nazombies mostly employ conventional weaponry but seem to have hit up the “underwater” section of the Comic Book Nazi Superweapon department, as not only are they fielding undersea tabks but these extremely cool personal shark submersibles

    This is, by the way, your go-to comic if you have ever wanted to see the Golden Age Angel get crucified by a bunch of Nazi zombies. Not to worry though: Namor rescues him and from then on it’s strictly Nazi-punching time.

    I don’t reckon that the Nazombies have enough potential to be BRUNG BACK but it really seems like the shark-sub tech is ripe for revival in the hands of coastal raiders or something. Once such a revolutionary technology is unleashed it can’t be put back in the bottle.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 328: THE NAZOMBIES

    (Human Torch v1 005a, 1941)

    This is kind of a weird one in a few ways, the first being that the foundation of the plot is that a) Namor the Sub-Mariner and the Angel both own Caribbean islands and b) that they are good enough friends for Namor to pay the Angel a visit. During this visit one of Namor’s servants bursts in and promptly drops dead in an effort to deliver a note cryptically warning of a zombie takeover.

    Namor takes off on his own and indeed! Zombies have taken over his island! Kind of!

    I mean, even by 1940s standards of zombie these are clearly either costumed goons or some sort of monstrous humanoid group. They’re not explicitly identified as fancy dress Nazis until the third-to-last panel, but come on. Buncha goose-steppers establishing military bases and concentration camps across the Caribbean? That’s Nazis.

    The Nazombies mostly employ conventional weaponry but seem to have hit up the “underwater” section of the Comic Book Nazi Superweapon department, as not only are they fielding undersea tabks but these extremely cool personal shark submersibles

    This is, by the way, your go-to comic if you have ever wanted to see the Golden Age Angel get crucified by a bunch of Nazi zombies. Not to worry though: Namor rescues him and from then on it’s strictly Nazi-punching time.

    I don’t reckon that the Nazombies have enough potential to be BRUNG BACK but it really seems like the shark-sub tech is ripe for revival in the hands of coastal raiders or something. Once such a revolutionary technology is unleashed it can’t be put back in the bottle.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 320: THE LEGION OF THE DOOMED

    (Daring Mystery Comics 006, 1940)

    There’s not much substance to the Legion of the Doomed, but there’s a lot of cool ideas, so lets knock them out.

    a) a weird figure imposes a baby on a couple dwelling in haunted hill country. The baby, it is later revealed, cries with the voice of a man.

    b) subsequently, a killer begins stalking the streets of a nearby city, probably New York. Panic ensues! The Fiery Mask is on the prowl.

    c) somewhat unsurprisingly, the killer and the baby turn out to be one and the same! There’s a missed opportunity for more creepy adult-acting baby, one of my favourite comics tropes. The Fiery Mask witnesses this transformation and manages to stop the next murder…

    d) … and pursues the killer back to whatever level of Comic Book Hell they came from. The Legion of the Doomed are slain! The city is safe! No questions have been answered:

    Why do these killings? Not sure.

    Why the whole ruse with the baby? No idea.

    Has the Legion of the Doomed actually been stopped? Not saying.

    Which actually opens the possibility of these guys being BRUNG BACK. I mean, supernatural killers are a dime a dozen, but these guys bring a creepy baby to the mix, plus they’re very easy to kill. Say they’re on some sort of ~80-year sacrifice cycle and you’re good to go. And it’s a perfect chance to bring the current Fiery Mask out of limbo!

  • MINOR SUPER-HERO 036: THE TOUGH KID SQUAD

    (Tough Kid Squad 001, 1942)

    I occasionally opine about the relative obscurity of one super-hero or another and it’s tricky to judge such a thing objectively, especially when it’s about a suite of characters who are all 100% unknown to the world at large. Despite this I am confident in my assertion that the Tough Kid Squad are the most obscure Marvel characters ever to receive their own title, even if it did only last one issue.

    The Tough Kid Squad is an obvious attempt by Marvel to replicate the formula of the Young Allies, but the technology to boil down a concept and recast it misfired somehow. The real key to a 40s kid gang is the mix of personalities – as seen in the Young Allies’ Smart Kid, Fat Kid, Tough Kid, Racial Stereotype and two Super-Hero Kids. The Tough Kid Squad on the other hand, is as follows:

    Wally Danger: Together with his brother Wally forms the Danger Twins, the Super-Hero kid Element of the team. Orphaned at a young age, the twins were raised separately after Tom was stolen by a crook to be his protege. They both benefit from a serum that their father gave them as infants which enhances their trained abilities. Wally mostly acts as the Smart Kid.

    Tom Danger: Raised to be a crook but his better nature shone through when he met his long-lost twin, Tom is a Tough Kid to his core.

    Derrick Dawes: A former school bully who was befriended after a beating from Tom. Tough Kid.

    Butch: A guy on the school football team who is befriended off-panel. Supposedly a Fat Kid based on the action but is drawn as and acts like a Tough Kid.

    Eagle: The football team also had a Racial Stereotype to befriend, albeit one who mostly acts like a Tough Kid. Eagle also presents the conundrum common to comic book racial stereotype characters: that because part of the joke of them is that they are acting against stereotype by being the hero of the piece they are often driving the action in the most interesting ways. 

    The main point of this breakdown is that true to its name the Tough Kid Squad is a real one-note kid gang. It is in fact weirdly tough to figure out if there is a true knockoff kirby in the bunch, in fact – they’re kind of all part of one gestalt knockoff kirby, with Eagle looking most the part and Tom acting it.

    Obviously I think the name should be brung back, and I’m kind of disappointed in Marvel for not dredging it up during the 50-State Initiative time – it might have been the only thing to make the fact that Hellcat was the entire Alaska Initiative team all by herself more fun. As for the members themselves… they are a bit generic, but the fact that the Danger Twins are all hopped up on serum offers the easy possibility for a couple of unaging characters to have been secretly operating for the last 80+ years, which is always fun.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 300: THE RINGMASTER OF CRIME

    (Captain America Comics 005, 1941)

    Finally, FINALLY, after 300  of these guys an arbitrary milestone lines up with a reasonably cool character: the Ringmaster of Crime AKA the Ringmaster of Death. Compounding the fun of the circus of crime aesthetic is the fact that some of that good-style retconning has been going on and the Ringmaster in this tale has been made the father (and presumably later grandfather, per Marvel’s sliding timeline) of the mid-level super-villain the Ringmaster! Uh, if saying that someone is someone else’s grampaw is a retcon, that is.

    The practical upshot of this is that this Minor Super-Villain writeup also functions as Super-Villain Yearbook, 1941 for the Circus of Crime, which, as a family-owned business entity, is contiguous with the version that reappeared in the 60s even though no individual members reoccur.

    All that said, the Ringmaster himself is a fairly regular Nazi creep super-villain. Sure he’s got the Jack Kirby villain snake-man look that we all love to hate but compared to his descendant (or, indeed, a regular circus ringmaster) he’s a positively dour dresser – his actual theming is pretty weak, when you get right down to it.

    Although we must not neglect the Wheel of Death, a perfectly cromulent random victim generator that the Ringmaster presumably stole from one of the sideshow games and spends hours/day applying all the little faces to.

    The real star here is the burgeoning Circus of Crime. Not all of the classic archetypes are present (no tall man, no fat guy) but it’s a pretty good criminal circus lineup already. To whit:

    Omir the Snake Charmer

    the Missing Link putting in an appearance for the sideshow folk

    Tommy Thumb the circus dwarf who might be held against his will? He definitely does not want to be there

    the Trapeze Trio

    Zandow the Strong Man

    various unnamed clowns, roustabouts and elephant handlers

    It’s not quite Princess Python levels but it’s a good showing.

    The Ringmaster of course gets trounced by Captain America, and then according to lore he gets murdered after the war by Nazi loyalists for his failure. His circus endures to this day, however, so that’s something. Speaking of which:

    CIRCUS OF CRIME 1941 

    Body Count: 2

    End-of-year Status: Captured/ Defunct

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 300: THE RINGMASTER OF CRIME

    (Captain America Comics 005, 1941)

    Finally, FINALLY, after 300  of these guys an arbitrary milestone lines up with a reasonably cool character: the Ringmaster of Crime AKA the Ringmaster of Death. Compounding the fun of the circus of crime aesthetic is the fact that some of that good-style retconning has been going on and the Ringmaster in this tale has been made the father (and presumably later grandfather, per Marvel’s sliding timeline) of the mid-level super-villain the Ringmaster! Uh, if saying that someone is someone else’s grampaw is a retcon, that is.

    The practical upshot of this is that this Minor Super-Villain writeup also functions as Super-Villain Yearbook, 1941 for the Circus of Crime, which, as a family-owned business entity, is contiguous with the version that reappeared in the 60s even though no individual members reoccur.

    All that said, the Ringmaster himself is a fairly regular Nazi creep super-villain. Sure he’s got the Jack Kirby villain snake-man look that we all love to hate but compared to his descendant (or, indeed, a regular circus ringmaster) he’s a positively dour dresser – his actual theming is pretty weak, when you get right down to it.

    Although we must not neglect the Wheel of Death, a perfectly cromulent random victim generator that the Ringmaster presumably stole from one of the sideshow games and spends hours/day applying all the little faces to.

    The real star here is the burgeoning Circus of Crime. Not all of the classic archetypes are present (no tall man, no fat guy) but it’s a pretty good criminal circus lineup already. To whit:

    Omir the Snake Charmer

    the Missing Link putting in an appearance for the sideshow folk

    Tommy Thumb the circus dwarf who might be held against his will? He definitely does not want to be there

    the Trapeze Trio

    Zandow the Strong Man

    various unnamed clowns, roustabouts and elephant handlers

    It’s not quite Princess Python levels but it’s a good showing.

    The Ringmaster of course gets trounced by Captain America, and then according to lore he gets murdered after the war by Nazi loyalists for his failure. His circus endures to this day, however, so that’s something. Speaking of which:

    CIRCUS OF CRIME 1941 

    Body Count: 2

    End-of-year Status: Captured/ Defunct

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 298: THE UNHOLY LEGION

    (Captain America Comics 004, 1941)

    This is one of those moments where the first examples of a thing that shows up here is not a great example of the thing. Blame the tyranny of alphabetical order, I suppose, because I know for a fact that Star-Spangled Comics will feature the Ring of Rags when I work my way down my list to it, and that is a good example.

    The thing in question is of course Poor People as a Horrifying and Existential Threat, and it’s going to crop up periodically. The poor end up as a creeping horde without real agency of their own who can be mobilized in service to some evil end, in this case the destabilization of the American military/ industrial complex.

    The reason that this is not the best example of the type is that the people in question are probably not actually poor beggars but Nazi spies. I mean, they are absolutely Nazi spies. The probably is in regard to the fact that there’s no indication that any of them are anything else. Actual poor people being portrayed as monsters will have to wait.

    (bonus: the thing that gets Captain America and Bucky on this case is that they give a guy money and then he turns out not to be disabled enough for them to have done so)

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 260: THE SIX BIG MEN

    (Marvel Comics v1 001, 1939)

    The Six Big Men ain’t much, just a bunch of guys who teamed up to do the maximum amount of Crime possible in an unidentified American city. But I am including them in this list, for two reasons: 1. they’re the first even marginal minor super-villains in Marvel Comics (I of course know about Timely Comics, pedants, but I round up) history, and 2. the Six Big Men are actually Seven Big Men and One Big Woman, and I love me some nominative misdirection.

    So it’s like this: the Six Big Men work for Dr Lang (above, middle, bottom) and his associate Lil, with an agreement to split all earnings evenly at the end of one year. Lang and Lil, preferring to reap the entire profit themselves, hatch a plot that involves Lang forming a citizen’s group to combat crime and influencing that group to bring in bigger-deal-in-the–golden-Age super-hero the Angel to kill everyone.

    And it almost works! The Angel kills basically everyone! The one flaw, of course, is that Lang does very little to cover his tracks and also drew attention to himself in the first place. Ah well, it’s early days in the Timely Marvel Universe.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 260: THE SIX BIG MEN

    (Marvel Comics v1 001, 1939)

    The Six Big Men ain’t much, just a bunch of guys who teamed up to do the maximum amount of Crime possible in an unidentified American city. But I am including them in this list, for two reasons: 1. they’re the first even marginal minor super-villains in Marvel Comics (I of course know about Timely Comics, pedants, but I round up) history, and 2. the Six Big Men are actually Seven Big Men and One Big Woman, and I love me some nominative misdirection.

    So it’s like this: the Six Big Men work for Dr Lang (above, middle, bottom) and his associate Lil, with an agreement to split all earnings evenly at the end of one year. Lang and Lil, preferring to reap the entire profit themselves, hatch a plot that involves Lang forming a citizen’s group to combat crime and influencing that group to bring in bigger-deal-in-the–golden-Age super-hero the Angel to kill everyone.

    And it almost works! The Angel kills basically everyone! The one flaw, of course, is that Lang does very little to cover his tracks and also drew attention to himself in the first place. Ah well, it’s early days in the Timely Marvel Universe.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 259: THE POWER STEALERS

    (Hit Comics 008, 1941)

    I gotta say: I really like these guys. Now, obviously they’re stinkers of the highest order – their plan involves siphoning all electrical power in the US until they are paid an unspecified amount of big bucks or possibly even placed in charge – but when you spend a little (or a lot of) time thinking about supercrime in a super-hero universe you get opinions about these kinds of things. If these guys had developed this technology I’d have something to say about the risk/reward of crime vs commercial application, but they’re clearly a bunch of criminal goons and probably stole it, so using it for crime makes sense!

    Further, they are genre-savvy enough to recognize Hercules as the only super-hero in their particular pocket of the Quality Comics proto-universe. Setting out to preemptively take care of the super-opposition never actually works, but I always appreciate the effort involved.

    (also I love that they call Hercules a hick. So often the little interesting details about a character fall by the wayside – it’s great that Hercules is consistently the super-hero from the country)

    The guy in purple is a bad liar.

    The guy in green is a loveable jerk.

    The gang of shirtless goons is everything I could wish in a bunch of cannon-fodder henchmen, down to the guy with a knife clutched in his teeth.

    Finally (well, for my purposes. Finally finally, they get beat up), they actually have a plan! They manage to chuck Hercules into quick-drying cement and cheekily make him into a statue to be displayed on their front porch! And he’s there for weeks! Very good job, boys.

    (though if they hadn’t chiseled off all that extra cement then maybe he wouldn’t have managed to get free. Food for thought, dead fictional men)