The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: group

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 258: THE FOUR LAMAS

    (Hit Comics 007, 1941)

    If Tibetan Lams aren’t the top religious figures cast as super-villains then they at least have to be in the top three, along with druids and Catholic priests – we won’t see any of those for a while but once they get going they go hard.

    This bunch of Lamas have decided to turn their formidable mental powers (natch) to the task of world conquest, and have chosen to do so by influencing the mind of one President Karla of an unnamed European state to become a rabid warmonger.

    The “Scheming Oriental Mastermind” bit was old before comics existed, and honestly I’d be tempted to skip these guys if this story didn’t include two truly incredible bits: 1. Neon the Unknown flies Karla across Europe and Asia as a sort of human dowsing rod to determine exactly where the mental influence is being broadcast from.

    2. Neon resolves things via mental combat with all three of the Four Lamas (the artist lost track of one of them midway through the story). He of course wins…

    … and their brains explode! Truly a redeeming end for some cliched characters.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 258: THE FOUR LAMAS

    (Hit Comics 007, 1941)

    If Tibetan Lams aren’t the top religious figures cast as super-villains then they at least have to be in the top three, along with druids and Catholic priests – we won’t see any of those for a while but once they get going they go hard.

    This bunch of Lamas have decided to turn their formidable mental powers (natch) to the task of world conquest, and have chosen to do so by influencing the mind of one President Karla of an unnamed European state to become a rabid warmonger.

    The “Scheming Oriental Mastermind” bit was old before comics existed, and honestly I’d be tempted to skip these guys if this story didn’t include two truly incredible bits: 1. Neon the Unknown flies Karla across Europe and Asia as a sort of human dowsing rod to determine exactly where the mental influence is being broadcast from.

    2. Neon resolves things via mental combat with all three of the Four Lamas (the artist lost track of one of them midway through the story). He of course wins…

    … and their brains explode! Truly a redeeming end for some cliched characters.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 257: THE SWORDS OF DEATH

    (Hit Comics 006, 1940)

    Once again we find ourselves profiling the interesting henchmen of a run-of-the-mill villain: the Swords of Death, in this case. A trio of assassin/ thieves armed with electrified rapiers and high opinions of themselves, the Swords have the misfortune to run into perennial-punching-bag-but-actually-fun-character the Red Bee on what seems to be their first mission, whereupon he promptly kills two of them.  

    I like the Swords of Death – any time a hero has to beat up a bunch of cool henchmen is okay by me, and cool electric swordsmen who sneak around in hats and overcoats like the Ninja Turtles are extra fun. Possibly the most intriguing thing about them, however, is that the surviving member of the three kills himself upon being defeated by the Red Bee, rather than be captured. A shocking degree of loyalty! Especially as…

    … he works for this weird little creep (named Kulak, in a weird made-up name coincidence), continuing the long comic book tradition of inexplicable loyalty-unto-death by ruthless killers toward people who probably wouldn’t buy them a coffee on their birthday, let alone give a damn that they were dead.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 257: THE SWORDS OF DEATH

    (Hit Comics 006, 1940)

    Once again we find ourselves profiling the interesting henchmen of a run-of-the-mill villain: the Swords of Death, in this case. A trio of assassin/ thieves armed with electrified rapiers and high opinions of themselves, the Swords have the misfortune to run into perennial-punching-bag-but-actually-fun-character the Red Bee on what seems to be their first mission, whereupon he promptly kills two of them.  

    I like the Swords of Death – any time a hero has to beat up a bunch of cool henchmen is okay by me, and cool electric swordsmen who sneak around in hats and overcoats like the Ninja Turtles are extra fun. Possibly the most intriguing thing about them, however, is that the surviving member of the three kills himself upon being defeated by the Red Bee, rather than be captured. A shocking degree of loyalty! Especially as…

    … he works for this weird little creep (named Kulak, in a weird made-up name coincidence), continuing the long comic book tradition of inexplicable loyalty-unto-death by ruthless killers toward people who probably wouldn’t buy them a coffee on their birthday, let alone give a damn that they were dead.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 254: THE SMOKE THIEF

    (Flash Comics v1 023, 1941)

    I’ll be honest: this is a very charitable entry on this list. The Smoke Thief is Dr Lucius Darrell and his gang of toughs, who use smoke bombs and special goggles to rob people on trains. If this was the main focus of the story, that might just be enough for full Minor Super-Villain status, but it ain’t.

    The real point of the story is this. Darrell captures Hawkman, then tries to kill him by chucking him out of a plane, which leads to a whole sequence where Hawkman is nursed back to health by the birds, earns their trust and eventually becomes their leader, leading them in righteous vengence against poor unsuspecting Dr Darrell.

    So yes, I’m being charitable. Being absolutely destroyed by Hawkman and an army of birds isn’t particularly villainous but it must be terrifically unpleasant. Plus the Smoke Thief is an excellent name.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 254: THE SMOKE THIEF

    (Flash Comics v1 023, 1941)

    I’ll be honest: this is a very charitable entry on this list. The Smoke Thief is Dr Lucius Darrell and his gang of toughs, who use smoke bombs and special goggles to rob people on trains. If this was the main focus of the story, that might just be enough for full Minor Super-Villain status, but it ain’t.

    The real point of the story is this. Darrell captures Hawkman, then tries to kill him by chucking him out of a plane, which leads to a whole sequence where Hawkman is nursed back to health by the birds, earns their trust and eventually becomes their leader, leading them in righteous vengence against poor unsuspecting Dr Darrell.

    So yes, I’m being charitable. Being absolutely destroyed by Hawkman and an army of birds isn’t particularly villainous but it must be terrifically unpleasant. Plus the Smoke Thief is an excellent name.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 243: CRIME & CORRUPTION INC

    (Flash Comics v1 013, 1941)

    I almost didn’t include these guys because Johnny Thunder lives in a heightened cartoon reality that only exists within the same world as the Spectre or Hawkman because of the technicality of them all being in the same club and hanging out together. But then, is the fact that New York is full of goofy-ass cartoon people in Johnny’s reality any more implausible than Alexander the Great blowing up a portion of the city without apparent consequence in Hawkman’s? I say thee nay. Besides, Johnny’s adventures almost never verge into super-villain territory… we gotta strike while we can!

    So: we find Johnny and his best gal Daisy Darling attending a production of “the Creep”, starring actor Jan Marrimore (!) as the titular Creep (a stand-in for a real person playing a fictional villain in a super-hero universe: all my very specific interests are colliding!).

    At the end of the play, Marrimore reveals that the show is a stunt designed to publicize the existence and uniform of a crime syndicate operating in the city. Johnny of course immediately encounters one of these men, does not recognize him and is pickpocketed by him. After some back and forth involving ridiculous magic powers, the pickpocket swears to reform and all is well. OR IS IT?

    It’s not! The remaining members of the gang (which we only now learn the name of – thanks for nothing, Marrimore) swear bloody vengeance and set out to murder Johnny. It’s only the fact that he’s juiced up on Badhnisian thunderbolt magic that saves the poor oaf.

    And that’s that, really. Just a gang of costumed crooks, but they’re Johnny’s gang and he almost never gets to fight proper villains. Since they’re comedy characters they end up as paper-thin props for Johnny to bounce around, so there’s not much to say about them beyond what I will always say about the suit/cape combo: that I love it.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 243: CRIME & CORRUPTION INC

    (Flash Comics v1 013, 1941)

    I almost didn’t include these guys because Johnny Thunder lives in a heightened cartoon reality that only exists within the same world as the Spectre or Hawkman because of the technicality of them all being in the same club and hanging out together. But then, is the fact that New York is full of goofy-ass cartoon people in Johnny’s reality any more implausible than Alexander the Great blowing up a portion of the city without apparent consequence in Hawkman’s? I say thee nay. Besides, Johnny’s adventures almost never verge into super-villain territory… we gotta strike while we can!

    So: we find Johnny and his best gal Daisy Darling attending a production of “the Creep”, starring actor Jan Marrimore (!) as the titular Creep (a stand-in for a real person playing a fictional villain in a super-hero universe: all my very specific interests are colliding!).

    At the end of the play, Marrimore reveals that the show is a stunt designed to publicize the existence and uniform of a crime syndicate operating in the city. Johnny of course immediately encounters one of these men, does not recognize him and is pickpocketed by him. After some back and forth involving ridiculous magic powers, the pickpocket swears to reform and all is well. OR IS IT?

    It’s not! The remaining members of the gang (which we only now learn the name of – thanks for nothing, Marrimore) swear bloody vengeance and set out to murder Johnny. It’s only the fact that he’s juiced up on Badhnisian thunderbolt magic that saves the poor oaf.

    And that’s that, really. Just a gang of costumed crooks, but they’re Johnny’s gang and he almost never gets to fight proper villains. Since they’re comedy characters they end up as paper-thin props for Johnny to bounce around, so there’s not much to say about them beyond what I will always say about the suit/cape combo: that I love it.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 235: THE ORDER OF ASSASSINS

    (Flash Comics v1 005, 1940)

    It’s another version of the old Order of Assassins, this time as a revival founded by a supposed descendant of Hassan-i Sabbah, the original Assassin of yore, though since he died in 1124 AD there’s a decent chance that anybody is his descendant. 

    Legitimacy aside, this buncha yahoos operates out of a city-fortress called Alamut (but somewhere in the vicinity of Egypt rather than Iran) and is engaged in a somewhat nebulous plot to conquer the world by assassinating various leaders, including that of the very delicious-sounding nation of Frappe. Hawkman foils this scheme with a few well-placed sling bullets, but even though their leaders are killed, the bulk of the organization survives, possibly as part of the next iteration of the Order, whenever that crops up.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 235: THE ORDER OF ASSASSINS

    (Flash Comics v1 005, 1940)

    It’s another version of the old Order of Assassins, this time as a revival founded by a supposed descendant of Hassan-i Sabbah, the original Assassin of yore, though since he died in 1124 AD there’s a decent chance that anybody is his descendant. 

    Legitimacy aside, this buncha yahoos operates out of a city-fortress called Alamut (but somewhere in the vicinity of Egypt rather than Iran) and is engaged in a somewhat nebulous plot to conquer the world by assassinating various leaders, including that of the very delicious-sounding nation of Frappe. Hawkman foils this scheme with a few well-placed sling bullets, but even though their leaders are killed, the bulk of the organization survives, possibly as part of the next iteration of the Order, whenever that crops up.