The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: magic

  • MINOR SUPER-HERO 052: ZARDI, THE ETERNAL MAN

    MINOR SUPER-HERO 052: ZARDI, THE ETERNAL MAN

    (Amazing-Man Comics 011, 1940)

    Zardi, Prince of Zandipore, the Eternal Man. The immortal guy is a fun character type that is usually assigned to villains, presumably because someone with endless knowledge and resources will prove a challenge to even the most seasoned of heroes. Plus they can have inscrutable long-range goals! In Zardi’s case, he just wants to have a good rest (reasonable as he is upwards of 15 000 years old) but will rouse himself to combat evil using his magic cape (restores Zardi’s youth, invisibility, flight), magic cane (magical multitool and focus for spellcasting) and array of magics (including illusions, sleep, tlekinesis, etc). He also has an implied network of agents around the world but we only meet his manservant Nogi and a young woman named Janni Bayless.

    All that is by way of setting the scene: the thing I really want to look at is the series of vignettes used to highlight Zardi’s immortal nature.

    We’re going to tally everything up down at the bottom. See you there!

    Grand totals!

    Concrete events:

    – Knows the secret of the Sphinx: |

    – Saw the Egyptian kings buried: |

    – Saw the Flood: |

    – Saw the Fountain of Youth hidden away forever: |

    – Saw the parting of the Red Sea: ||

    – Saw the Pyramids built: |||

    – Witnessed the fall of Babylon: |

    and the more ephemeral:

    – Knows every form of magic: |

    – Knows the locations of various riches: ||

    – Learned the secret of Chaldean magic: |

    – Saw Hindu magic created: |

    What does this tell us? Well, for starters the Bible is real, at least up to Exodus (was Zardi on the Ark or was he just immortal enough to float around for a month plus? no clue). Zardi really likes Egypt and the Middle East. 

    Magic? Real, and Zardi knows all of it. The Fountain of Youth? Real, and Zardi was there to see it. I imagine that “we found a whole new continent” is a very exciting thing to hear when you’re an immortal. Even one who doesn’t travel much.

    In conclusion, there’s not as much meat on this bit as I imagined! Oh, and Zardi the Eternal Man is pretty okay.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 384: DEEJA KATHOON

    (More Fun Comics 067, 1941)

    Deeja Kathoon is an occultist and necromancer who has the ability to summon and bind ghosts to his service and uses this power to unleash a ghostly crimewave on Cliffland, NJ. He has what turns out to be an Indian surname but there’s no indication in-story that he’s supposed to be Indian and so I must assume that it’s a coincidence and that my first guess was correct and his name was chosen by picking random syllables out of a hat.

    Ordinarily this would be the point at which I say “unfortunately, he chose to do his crimes in the Spectre’s home town,” but not this time, for you see the Spectre is a ghost. Kathoon binds him just like any other ghost and almost forces him to destroy the Cliffland City Hospital before the Ring of Life manages to deus ex machina him out of that particular jam.

    One thing that goes unexplored and unexplained in the story is the zippy little rocket ship that Kathoon tries to escape in once the Spectre is free. In the absence of any hint or eleventh hour reveal that he is an alien or magical time traveller I must assume that it is a magic rocket ship, which is great. More magic rocket ships are what we need, in my humble opinion.

    It’s just possible that being forced to do Kathoon’s bidding rattled the Spectre, or at least convinced him that the guy was a legitimate threat, because not only does he kill him via rocket ship explosion, he then hunts down and kills his ghost. This is, yes, a step more extreme than 1939 Batman gunning down the odd monster, but then again this is the Spectre. He has a reputation for brutality for a reason.

    In conclusion, this little cloud guy that Kathoon made to intimidate the Spectre is the sensational character find of 1941.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 384: DEEJA KATHOON

    (More Fun Comics 067, 1941)

    Deeja Kathoon is an occultist and necromancer who has the ability to summon and bind ghosts to his service and uses this power to unleash a ghostly crimewave on Cliffland, NJ. He has what turns out to be an Indian surname but there’s no indication in-story that he’s supposed to be Indian and so I must assume that it’s a coincidence and that my first guess was correct and his name was chosen by picking random syllables out of a hat.

    Ordinarily this would be the point at which I say “unfortunately, he chose to do his crimes in the Spectre’s home town,” but not this time, for you see the Spectre is a ghost. Kathoon binds him just like any other ghost and almost forces him to destroy the Cliffland City Hospital before the Ring of Life manages to deus ex machina him out of that particular jam.

    One thing that goes unexplored and unexplained in the story is the zippy little rocket ship that Kathoon tries to escape in once the Spectre is free. In the absence of any hint or eleventh hour reveal that he is an alien or magical time traveller I must assume that it is a magic rocket ship, which is great. More magic rocket ships are what we need, in my humble opinion.

    It’s just possible that being forced to do Kathoon’s bidding rattled the Spectre, or at least convinced him that the guy was a legitimate threat, because not only does he kill him via rocket ship explosion, he then hunts down and kills his ghost. This is, yes, a step more extreme than 1939 Batman gunning down the odd monster, but then again this is the Spectre. He has a reputation for brutality for a reason.

    In conclusion, this little cloud guy that Kathoon made to intimidate the Spectre is the sensational character find of 1941.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 382: THE MAN

    (More Fun Comics 066, 1941) 

    Out of nowhere one day, giant monsters attack Cliffland, New Jersey!

    After driving them off a couple of times, the Spectre manages to follow them back to their base of operations, a weird painting of unknown provenance hanging in a Cliffland museum. There he finds that the monsters reside in a metal city ruled over by a man referred to only as the Man.

    The Man is clearly modeled after the fascist dictators of the day and spends his time whipping his monstrous subjects into a frenzy prior to a wholesale invasion of the real world. While I don’t appreciate the attempted-destruction-of-humanity of it all I must admit that he has some wonderful turns of phrase. Maybe being a fictional entity allows you to tap into a poetical mindset more easily.

    The Man‘s schemes all come to nothing as the Spectre invades his world and decimates his forces, then overcomes the Man himself (despite the Man deploying not only a variety of magical powers but a surprise eleventh-hour monster transformation) and destroys both the painting and the world it contains.

    I have to say that despite not particularly loving the monster designs here I do love the idea of an outsider artist putting so much of themself into a work that it gains a life of its own. BRING BACK the Man, I say, whether in another work by the same artist or as a fictional parasite who appears in other paintings until he can find one that he can use as a portal to the real world. He would be a great addition to the ranks of the DCU’s magical weirdos.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 381: NYARL-AMEN

    (More Fun Comics 065, 1941)

    Okay, so the guy on the throne is Nyarl-Amen, AKA the Ancient One AKA the Lost Wisdom AKA the Wonder Wisdom. Fifty thousand years ago he ruled the world from beneath the waves as head of the Nyarl-Amen Dynasty.

    Nyarl-Amen has lived in the City of Nyarl-Amen for one hundred thousand years…

    His arsenal includes the Magic Eyes of Nyarl-Amen…

    And together with his minions the Fish Men of Nyarl-Amen he seeks to reconquer the world and presumably establish a Second Dynasty of Nyarl-Amen. Whatever you say about this civilization, “It has too many names,” can’t be one of them.

    The thing is, all this repetition has left me unsure just whether we’re dealing with an immortal fish-man sea-wizard attempting to reclaim his glory after 500 centuries or a city with an upstart ruler and bad imagination. I suppose whether it’s Nyarl-Amen the First or Nyarl-Amen the Six Hundred and Fifteenth doesn’t really matter since Dr Fate ends up blowing up every single Nyarl-Amen mentioned thusfar.

    These guys should 100% be BRUNG BACK for one simple reason: the best thing about Aquaman stories is the weird collection of pulp novel civilizations that coat the DCU seafloor and these fish-head weirdos would enhance that immeasurably.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 381: NYARL-AMEN

    (More Fun Comics 065, 1941)

    Okay, so the guy on the throne is Nyarl-Amen, AKA the Ancient One AKA the Lost Wisdom AKA the Wonder Wisdom. Fifty thousand years ago he ruled the world from beneath the waves as head of the Nyarl-Amen Dynasty.

    Nyarl-Amen has lived in the City of Nyarl-Amen for one hundred thousand years…

    His arsenal includes the Magic Eyes of Nyarl-Amen…

    And together with his minions the Fish Men of Nyarl-Amen he seeks to reconquer the world and presumably establish a Second Dynasty of Nyarl-Amen. Whatever you say about this civilization, “It has too many names,” can’t be one of them.

    The thing is, all this repetition has left me unsure just whether we’re dealing with an immortal fish-man sea-wizard attempting to reclaim his glory after 500 centuries or a city with an upstart ruler and bad imagination. I suppose whether it’s Nyarl-Amen the First or Nyarl-Amen the Six Hundred and Fifteenth doesn’t really matter since Dr Fate ends up blowing up every single Nyarl-Amen mentioned thusfar.

    These guys should 100% be BRUNG BACK for one simple reason: the best thing about Aquaman stories is the weird collection of pulp novel civilizations that coat the DCU seafloor and these fish-head weirdos would enhance that immeasurably.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 375: HALDANE THE SORCERER

    (More Fun Comics 063, 1941)

    Haldane the Sorcerer has no backstory in-comic, so I’m going to be making some assumptions here. Assumption Number 1: since he first comes to light at society party that is also attended by Dr Fate pal Inza Cramer I am going to assume that he is part of the same New York/ New England social set as her, as opposed to some sort of party crasher. 

    Assumption Number 2: Haldane is a hobbyist. He is a rich guy who has managed to buy his way into learning, artifacts and power. He obviously has the magic skills to, for instance, turn someone to stone or rig up a voodoo doll to kill them in three days, but he lacks all sense of the practical. As an example: why the heck does he deploy his scheme in the middle of a party attended by none other than Dr Fate’s main squeeze? Because he’s never done anything like this before.

    Let me elaborate on his scheme to underline my point: Haldane is after the hidden treasure of the Jeromes, hidden deep in secret passages below their manor and thought by all to be a mere legend. He has discovered the location of the treasure via scrying. All of his spells seem to be status effect curses – surely the best way to go about things would be to sneak in, maybe curse someone to send them to the hospital? Not running into the middle of a party throwing curses left and right – amateur move.

    To cap it all off, when things start going off the rails Haldane decides to summon a cosmic horror (that, yes, looks a lot like a big bald lug). It’s a wild overreaction that doesn’t even solve his problems – it just scares that poor lady!

    Anyway, Dr Fate socks him one and he flies into the sea. An ignominious end for a mighty sorcerer.

  • MINOR SUPER-HERO 043: MISS AMERICA

    (Military Comics 001-007, 1941-1942) 

    I am not the first to note this by a country mile but it must be said every time she comes up: she wishes to have all of the powers of the Statue of Liberty and then the Statue of Liberty visits her in a dream and gifts them to her. If USA didn’t exist then this would be a shoe-in for “most outlandish patriotic hero concept” but as it stands I reckon that they’re tied.

    Those powers, by the way, aren’t “being enormous and made of bronze” like you might expect but rather a host of generic Golden Age magical abilities such as teleportation, telekinesis and transmutation – particularly of goons into birds and trees and such.

    Miss America gets brought back every once in a while but the most noteworthy thing about her, her wild origin, was retconned in the Eighties. Now instead of wishing for the powers of the Statue of Liberty and then getting them (absurd, laughable) she wished for the powers of the Statue of Liberty near the entrance to a secret government project underneath the statue and was given powers by them (high concept, realistic).

    In conclusion: I quite like Golden Age Miss America but find it hard to get excited about her later incarnations.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 356: OLBAID THE GREAT

    (Master Comics 016, 1941)

    I almost missed the fact that this guy is an evil equivalent of El Carim! I somehow read that opening blurb and thought that his name was Diablo but it’s not, it’s Olbaid – he has a backward name like El Carim!

    What’s more, Olbaid has roughly equivalent magical powers to El Carim, and uses magical items to supplement them just like him. In Olbaid’s case, this involves the Snake Pool, a magical pool of water that turns humans into constrictor snakes, suitable for use as snakey minions.

    While Olbaid is not a stage magician like El Carim, he does have a show business tie via his stable of ex-circus performer henchmen, including cowboy Rifle Ralph, lariat artist Roper Pete and an unnamed knife thrower.

    Sadly for Olbaid, the similarities between him and El Carim end when it comes to power levels and their magical duel ends with Olbaid in jail and the snakes restored to humans who hopefully can’t remember being used to squash a bunch of people.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 356: OLBAID THE GREAT

    (Master Comics 016, 1941)

    I almost missed the fact that this guy is an evil equivalent of El Carim! I somehow read that opening blurb and thought that his name was Diablo but it’s not, it’s Olbaid – he has a backward name like El Carim!

    What’s more, Olbaid has roughly equivalent magical powers to El Carim, and uses magical items to supplement them just like him. In Olbaid’s case, this involves the Snake Pool, a magical pool of water that turns humans into constrictor snakes, suitable for use as snakey minions.

    While Olbaid is not a stage magician like El Carim, he does have a show business tie via his stable of ex-circus performer henchmen, including cowboy Rifle Ralph, lariat artist Roper Pete and an unnamed knife thrower.

    Sadly for Olbaid, the similarities between him and El Carim end when it comes to power levels and their magical duel ends with Olbaid in jail and the snakes restored to humans who hopefully can’t remember being used to squash a bunch of people.