The Curse of Skeleton Munroe

Category: kidnapper

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 853: GOBI, SUPER-WIZARD OF THE DESERT

    (Weird Comics 009, 1940)

    The Sorceress of Zoom is enjoying herself by tormenting people in the desert one day when she is suddenly confronted and challenged for possession of her victims by Gobi, Super-Wizard of the Desert! Is he some sort of heroic magic-user looking to free the people from their torturous servitude? Of course not! He’s looking for food for his pet vultures! 

    (aside: the Sorceress of Zoom is never the good guy in these situations, but this might be the one in which she is the most the bad guy. Sure, Gobi wants to feed the people to his critters, but here’s a list of just what the SoZ gets up to in the first few pages of this comic:

    -harness a bunch of guys to a platfrom (definitely not a sled) covered in treasure and force them to haul it through the desert while whipping them

    -when they complain about being thirsty, create an illusory oasis to tempt them into greater effort

    -once they realize the trick, abandon them in the desert to die

    -ambush and enslave a caravan to replace the first bunch of guys

    -petrify most of those who fight back and leave others trapped in a circle of eternal flame

    -make the rest haul that platform through the desert and when someone complains of thirst, turn him into a skeleton

    -force another complainer to climb a ladder to nowhere, while whipping him

    -turn everyone else into camel centaurs

    It’s all a bit much) 

    (2nd aside: though Gobi is of course named after the famous Asian desert, I’m pretty sure that this comic takes place somewhere in North Africa) 

    Gobi manages to get the upper hand early on with a surprise shrink spell, but just before his vultures start to chow down she reappears at full size and max strength to initiate an old-fashioned  magical duel.

    As always, there is a best part to any such duel, and in this case it is when Gobi completely dissolves the Sorceress of Zoom with magical acid. This of course does not kill her, but does leave her as a disembodied spirit for a while.

    As usual, the duel eventually turns into something closer to a child’s game in which the Sorceress merely goes “nuh-uh” in response to every attack by Gobi. This supports my theory that all of this is in aid of alleviating her boredom. Was she tormenting those guys in an area that Gobi was known to haunt in order to pick a fight? It’s entirely possible! All good things must come to an end, however, and once the Super-Wizard of the Desert ceases to entertain he is unceremoniously transformed into a desert spring.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 844: ZOM

    (Weird Comics 002, 1940) 

    Space adventurers Blast Bennett and his pal Red are tooling around the Solar System one day when they are hailed by and then hauled aboard an enormous space vessel.

    This vessel is Plane-City, the mobile headquarters of the space pirate Zom. Actually, I don’t know if “space pirate” is quite the right label for Zom, as his main passion seems to be taking and keeping prisoners rather than the more traditional piratical pursuit of taking prisoners and then ransoming them back to their home government or loved ones. I mean, just look at that dank stone dungeon that he has installed on his spaceship, presumably at great expense!

    Zom’s downfall comes thanks to the terrible state of his security – firstly, they allow Blast to get their boss in a headlock and chain him up in his own dungeon, and then it turns out that they didn’t even bother to check their new prisoners – one of whom, may I remind you, is named Blast – for ray guns. Just professionally shameful.

    Zom’s prisoners are all freed via space parachute, while Zom and his men meet their end at the barrel of that same ray gun. Plane-City, alas, does not survive the altercation.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 842: THE STONE MAN

    (Weird Comics 001, 1940)

    Here’s the thing about the Stone Man: I have no idea what his deal is, aside from the fact that he’s a creep. See, the Bird Man is just flying around the desert one day, as is his wont, when he runs into some guys searching for one of the guys’ daughter. After flying around for a bit, he discovers her in an isolated canyon, being sexually menaced by a weirdo and his animal companions. Why is he called the Stone Man? Not a clue. He’s much more of an animal guy than a stone guy, in that he doesn’t appear to have any stone-like qualities.

    After the Bird Man defeats the Stone Man’s coyotes, a vulture flies off with the girl and the Bird Man sets off in pursuit. He gets her away from it and returns her to her father and then… that’s it. We see no more of the Stone Man. It’s very anticlimactic!

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 842: THE STONE MAN

    (Weird Comics 001, 1940)

    Here’s the thing about the Stone Man: I have no idea what his deal is, aside from the fact that he’s a creep. See, the Bird Man is just flying around the desert one day, as is his wont, when he runs into some guys searching for one of the guys’ daughter. After flying around for a bit, he discovers her in an isolated canyon, being sexually menaced by a weirdo and his animal companions. Why is he called the Stone Man? Not a clue. He’s much more of an animal guy than a stone guy, in that he doesn’t appear to have any stone-like qualities.

    After the Bird Man defeats the Stone Man’s coyotes, a vulture flies off with the girl and the Bird Man sets off in pursuit. He gets her away from it and returns her to her father and then… that’s it. We see no more of the Stone Man. It’s very anticlimactic!

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 836: MORGANA LE FAY

    (Top-Notch Comics 009, 1940) 

    It’s another version of Morgan le Fay, less than two weeks after the last one! Will le Fay end up being the mythic/fictional character with the greatest number of comic book interpretations? Possibly!

    This version of Morgan le Fay, Morgana le Fey, is after revenge on Galahad for the death of her husband the Knight of the Griffin and so sends out squads of knights to find him and bring him back to be tiger food. Unfortunately for her, her knights are pretty unprofessional and fail to question the fact that the “Galahad” that they capture is unusually scrawny and meek and in fact turns out to be Garlan, Galahad’s squire, doing a bit of roleplay while his boss is asleep.

    Once the real Galahad shows up, Morgana’s men prove to be as inadequate at combat as they are at knight-identification and she is forced to play her trump card: the Monster. An eight-foot tall green guy who looks like he just stepped out of a science fiction comic, the Monster proves to be a match for Galahad and his horse.

    Lucky for Galahad, Garlan is on-hand to save the day by delivering the poorly-named magic sword Scabor to him as he and the Monster are battling in the depths of Morgana’s moat. It’s a heroic act for the lad, and it really underscores how terrible it was when he was captured earlier in the story and Galahad did not go after him because he was late for a meeting.

    Presumably Morgana le Fay would have continued to vex Galahad going forward, but the series ends while she is planning her next move. 

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 831: THE BLACK DEATH

    (Thrilling Comics 010, 1940)

    Perry Knight has a problem: instead of starring as the titular costumed antagonist of stage production “The Black Death” he has been jailed for murder. He can’t remember doing it, but evidently he gunned down his costar Tinker in cold blood during the dress rehearsal.

    Enter Peggy Allen, the Woman in Red, who quickly discovers that there is a second Black Death running around when they have a confrontation in the wings. Is this a foolish move on the part of the second Black Death, who presumably wants Perry Knight to be the sole suspect in the murder? Absolutely it is.

    Peggy manages to get Knight bailed out to continue the role of the Black Death as bait for the real killer, and indeed the false Black Death attempts to murder Tinker’s replacement at the same point in the show as before. The Woman in Red of course manages to prevent this second murder, and after some running around etc the Black Death is unmasked to reveal… Weber, the theatre owner!

    It turns out that Weber is in love with lead actress Linda Lytell and that this murder/framing/attempted murder/kidnapping (he kidnaps Lytell before the second murder attempt) is all part of an effort to get him out of the way so that Weber can woo her. A foolish plan, and not just because Weber does not appear to have shared his feelings with Lytell at any point, but because literally the first thing that happens in the story is Lytell rejecting Knight, something that Weber might have learned if he had engaged in some conventional human conversation and courtship before jumping straight to adopting a costumed persona.

    Also, the critics hate the play.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 831: THE BLACK DEATH

    (Thrilling Comics 010, 1940)

    Perry Knight has a problem: instead of starring as the titular costumed antagonist of stage production “The Black Death” he has been jailed for murder. He can’t remember doing it, but evidently he gunned down his costar Tinker in cold blood during the dress rehearsal.

    Enter Peggy Allen, the Woman in Red, who quickly discovers that there is a second Black Death running around when they have a confrontation in the wings. Is this a foolish move on the part of the second Black Death, who presumably wants Perry Knight to be the sole suspect in the murder? Absolutely it is.

    Peggy manages to get Knight bailed out to continue the role of the Black Death as bait for the real killer, and indeed the false Black Death attempts to murder Tinker’s replacement at the same point in the show as before. The Woman in Red of course manages to prevent this second murder, and after some running around etc the Black Death is unmasked to reveal… Weber, the theatre owner!

    It turns out that Weber is in love with lead actress Linda Lytell and that this murder/framing/attempted murder/kidnapping (he kidnaps Lytell before the second murder attempt) is all part of an effort to get him out of the way so that Weber can woo her. A foolish plan, and not just because Weber does not appear to have shared his feelings with Lytell at any point, but because literally the first thing that happens in the story is Lytell rejecting Knight, something that Weber might have learned if he had engaged in some conventional human conversation and courtship before jumping straight to adopting a costumed persona.

    Also, the critics hate the play.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 825: PROFESSOR FENTON

    (Thrilling Comics 004, 1940) 

    A wave of kidnappings is sweeping the US! Important men are disappearing left and right! Never fear, however, for the Ghost is on the case, and thanks to his magical acumen he is able to trace the latest kidnappee to the mysterious mansion lair of the culprit: the pompadoured scientist known as Professor Fenton! 

    Professor Fenton’s plan turns out to be unusually, even impractically complicated. To whit: 

    1. kidnap all of America’s Important Men

    2. stash the Important Men in various historical periods using a time machine

    3. take over the US (though unstated, the lack of Important Men is probably part of the prep for this step)

    4. bring back the Important Men, who will be forced to serve Fenton in this new regime

    The Ghost is of course opposed to this plan, and proceeds to rescue the first batch of Important Men from the past. But there is a problem! The Ghost does not know where or when the other men are stashed, plus he suspects that Fenton would rather destroy his own time machine than see them rescued. This sets up the ongoing Ghost/Fenton dynamic for the next few issues, as the Ghost arranges various ruses and schemes in order to be sent in time to rescue Fenton’s victims while keeping Fenton himself in the dark.

    Some of Fenton’s temporal kidnap setups include:

    A prehistoric past rich with both dinosaurs and early man. The Ghost recruits a tribe of Piltdown Men to battle Professor Fenton’s Neanderthal followers. (Thrilling Comics 004, 1940)

    A castle in Arthurian England, that the Ghost storms with the help of the Knights of the Round Table, armed with magically-created machine guns. (Thrilling Comics 005, 1940)

    Just an inn in the middle of Commonwealth-era London. The innkeeper is clearly a local, so of course I am very curious about how the Fenton’s recruitment process goes – does he just appear in people’s houses until he finds one willing to hold prisoners for cash, no questions asked?  (Thrilling Comics 006, 1940)

    This issue is also the first time that Fenton tries to get his chosen nom de guerre, “Dictator F” going, but it never quite manages to get traction. He does keep trying!

    Fenton’s temporal hiding places have one important criteria: they act as a fixed point in time and space that he can target with his time beam. This is why this next one being in the ship, a notoriously mobile space, is strange. Sure, Professor Fenton has paid off the owners of the vessel not to go anywhere, but if he had bothered to take a look at the ship’s name he might have noted that it was in fact the Santa Maria, of Christopher Columbus fame, and concluded that he might be better off storing his victims elsewhere. 

    The Ghost and these two Important Men end up making the journey to the New World with Columbus before heading home. Considering the fact that Fenton-style time travel is depicted as if the same amount of time is taking place in the present as the past, this really throws the Ghost timeline out of whack with the real world. (Thrilling Comics 007, 1940)

    Fenton finally starts working toward his conquest of the present by stealing an electrical ray weapon that he stashes in Ancient Rome, c.64 CE, which inadvertently leads to the Great Fire of Rome. (Thrilling Comics 008, 1940)

    Fenton’s final foray into his kidnapping plan (for 1940, at least) involves hotshot bacteriologist Tom Rollins, who is stashed in Colonial America, 1776, while his stockpile of diseases is unleashed on the public in an attempt to blackmail Rollins’ home city of Duquesne. The Ghost not only rescues Rollins but helps Washington cross the Delaware and also meets his long-time love interest Betty Morris, a Revolutionary spy who decides to ditch the humdrum 1770s for the exciting 1940s. (Thrilling Comics 009, 1940)

    From Thrilling Comics 010 on, the Ghost basically just lets Professor Fenton, a multiple-time mass murderer and mass-kidnapper, remain at large so that he can sneak into Fenton’s lab and use his time machine whenever he wants. I’m sure that if someone pointed that out then the Ghost would say something about there still being some Important Men to be saved, but I’m not sure if they’re worth the body count.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 821: KONG

    (Thrilling Comics 003, 1940)

    I can’t really devote a lot of energy to Kong because he just kind of makes me tired, conceptually. He’s a Yellow Peril dictator who has devoted a fair amount of time and resources to stealing both military secrets and entire scientists from the US as a part of his bid for world domination, opposed only by Doc Strange and his companion Virginia Thompson. All very exciting stuff in theory, but it all resolves into a kind of mush – it’s not even as racist as it could be, which is good but not remarkable.

    In the spirit of writing something interesting, here are the good parts of Kong’s story: 

    1. Location: Kong is the dictator of the Asian kingdom of Kachukuo, which was pretty fun to recognize as a stand-in for Manchukuo, the Chinese puppet-state established by the Japanese in 1932. I’m always chuffed to see Manchukuo come up both because it doesn’t really do so very often and because I managed to get pretty far into adulthood before I learned about this entire country, and the joy of learning about it is still fresh in my mind. Not that the history of Manchukuo itself is particularly joy-inspiring, but learning is learning.

    2. Rays. I like Kong’s big chunky ray technology. He’s got a red ray that brings the scientists out of the suspended animation he put them in for transport, a blue mind control ray (blue and red seem to come from the same machine) and a green death ray. What can I say, I like a ray, and I like colours.

    3. Wild Hill Warriors. At one point Kong tries to get rid of Doc Strong by subjecting him to gladiatorial combat and I just really like the fact that he managed to scare up some Germanic warriors fresh from the sack of Rome for the task. They don’t do very well but they’re fun!

    That’s about it for Kong. Doc Strange inspires a revolution in Kachukuo, chucks the dictator into his own chemical soup and thaws out the scientists with a little Alosun, bish bash bosh, start the countdown to the next Fu Manchu knockoff showing up.

  • MINOR SUPER-VILLAIN 819: THE MASK

    (Thrilling Comics 002, 1940)

    He may just be the leader of a gang of kidnappers, but the moment this fellow put on his nice blue mask and got all confident, he became special to me. This particular Mask (our ninth!) is brought in without too much fuss by short-lived Nedor Comics group the Three Comrades.